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While we’re undoubtedly more open about our likes and dislikes in the bedroom, some sex acts have missed the conventional radar, like pegging. The act, however, did recently land itself in the spotlight after being mentioned on Married At First Sight Australia, though many viewers did admit on social media that they had no idea what was involved.
If you’re in the dark, the practice might sound like a way to hang up your laundry. But while the act does involve being in-between the sheets, it has nothing to do with drying them. So, what is pegging?
What is pegging?
Pegging is basically a term which describes consensual anal sex using a strap-on dildo.
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The term itself was originally coined by Dan Savage in his Savage Love sex column, when the writer launched a competition in 2001 to find a term to describe the sex act between heterosexual men and women.
However, the origins of this term have since been renounced, as the term was created to remove any associations from anal sex, which many straight, cisgender men have previously regarded as being “gay”.
“With a wide range of sexual expression, orientation and gender identity, sex isn’t just focused on vaginal and penile sex and heteronormative practices,” Ness Cooper, a clinical sexologist, tells Tyla, “and that’s the same when it comes to anal practices such as pegging.”
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Previously, the term pegging referred to sex which involved a woman using a dildo or strap-on to penetrate a man, but it’s now understood that the act is available to everyone, no matter your identity or sexual preference.
“We’ve also come a long way in realising that sexual acts don’t always define sexual orientation and maybe a way to express fantasies that are outside the sexual orientation we fall into,” Cooper, who works as a sex and relationship coach at thesexconsultant.com, adds.
What’s so enjoyable about pegging?
Well, the enjoyment factor behind pegging all comes from the desire to explore new feelings of pleasure with your partner.
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The wide variety of readily-available sex toys now allow all people to consensually enjoy this act, no matter your gender or orientation.
“Not only has our understanding of human sexuality deepened, sex toys that used to be developed for certain body parts are becoming more gender-neutral or advertised in ways that allow individuals to explore them more openly, regardless of gender,” Cooper explains.
“There are even strap-ons designed that individuals with penises can use comfortably, and even double-ended strap-ons that allow the wearer to be penetrative too, and some of these are for either penis or vulva owners,” Cooper says.
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“And there's ones where individuals with penises can penetrate their partner with a vulva whilst pegging them with an anal strap-on dildos, giving them the experience of double penetration.”
How can you safely try pegging with your partner?
First things first, if you’re looking to try pegging with your partner, you’ve got to speak to them about it and get their enthusiastic consent.
Cooper advises that those interested in the act should “start small, by adding butt plugs into your other sexual play and even show them how you like being stimulated anally.”
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“Mutual masturbation can be a great way to introduce things to your partner,” whilst remembering that “masturbation isn’t all about vaginas and penises, but can include other body parts including the anus.”
But if it’s you that wants to be the “pegger”, rather than the “pegee”, it’s a good idea to start “debunking myths” around the act first, explaining to your partner “that it’s just another way to enjoy pleasure sexually”.
It's important to remember that there is no shame in trying or enjoying pegging, so long as it's a consensual act between all those who are partaking.
Featured Image Credit: Dainis GraverisTopics: Sex and Relationships, Life, Health