With lockdown effectively over and most restrictions eased, singletons are now free to get back on the dating scene.
But judging by the absolute state of men right now, why would you even want to?
While there are some decent guys out there, this story from the Reddit forum r/niceguys is enough to make you delete Tinder, throw your phone off a roof and join a nunnery.
Someone by the username MediumChilly posted about how one man they were talking to rather charmingly decided to send them a CV (yes, really, a CV) about what he’s looking for in a 'perfect woman'.
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And judging by the length of his resumé, all we can say is that it’s no surprise he’s single.
In a note titled ‘what I look for’, the man says he needs “a girl who likes to walk” as he does not own a car.
He continues his ideal pick would be “thinking about kids and family”, be “warm-hearted and open-minded” and she must let him steal “hugs and butt grabs.”
Don’t mind us while we loudly vomit.
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The unnamed man said he’s looking for “that beautiful type of relationship where life can be shared on a deeper level” and adds a woman who’s been in therapy is “perfect”.
In another document titled dealbreakers, the man doesn’t want a woman that “already has children”, “make-up freaks” or “any type of Nazi.”
“The type of women looking for a man to fix their broken life and all they can offer is an overused p***y,” he writes, before saying he doesn’t like “females” who don’t fill up their dating profiles, women who are hyperactive, and women who “overthink”.
The man then goes on to describe himself as “intelligent” as well as being “logical, direct, honest” and having “much common sense” (but no control over grammar).
The bizarre three-page document concludes with him writing: “Natural enemy of women. I use logic, science, statistics, common sense and reason, not emotions. Not an emotional person, which doesn’t mean I don’t have them, but they do not control me.”
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Naturally, the comments to the man’s CV were fairly damning.
“Dude digs on women for having standards, then claims women should meet his standards,” one shrewd person wrote. “...But he doesn't even come close to meeting his own standards for women.”
“Tell me you are a virgin without saying you are a virgin in 6,500 words or less,” a second person wrote.
While a third said: “He claims he doesn’t use emotions, but his whole stupid rant is full of nothing but emotions. It’s seething with man-baby entitlement, arrogance, pride, and vanity.”
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Ladies, form an orderly queue.
Featured Image Credit: ShutterstockTopics: Sex and Relationships