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Barack and Michelle Obama had major disagreement over 'controversial' parenting method while raising daughters

Home> Entertainment> Celebrity

Updated 18:34 26 Jun 2025 GMT+1Published 18:32 26 Jun 2025 GMT+1

Barack and Michelle Obama had major disagreement over 'controversial' parenting method while raising daughters

The former first lady opened up about how she and her hubby overcame the dispute

Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle

Featured Image Credit: Instagram/@‌barackobama / Instagram/@‌michelleobama

Topics: Celebrity, Michelle Obama, Parenting, Sex and Relationships

Rhiannon Ingle
Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle is a Senior Journalist at Tyla, specialising in TV, film, travel, and culture. A graduate of the University of Manchester with a degree in English Literature, she honed her editorial skills as the Lifestyle Editor of The Mancunian, the UK’s largest student newspaper. With a keen eye for storytelling, Rhiannon brings fresh perspectives to her writing, blending critical insight with an engaging style. Her work captures the intersection of entertainment and real-world experiences.

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Michelle Obama said she and Barack had a major disagreement over a 'controversial' parenting method she 'couldn't' deal with while raising their two children.

The former president of the United States and first lady share two adult daughters together following their wedding in 1992; Malia, 26, and Sasha, 24.

While the pair have been hailed as one of the most famous 'power couples' following Barack's time in office, it's clear that - just like most parents - they had their disagreements from time to time.

Opening up on Wednesday's episode (25 June) of her IMO podcast, Michelle reflected on her and her hubby's use of the Ferber Method in a conversation with social psychologist Jonathan Haidt.

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'What's the Ferber Method?' you may ask.

Well, according to the Sleep Foundation, practice, which got its name as it was invented by physician Richard Ferber, is a sleep training technique that helps babies learn to fall asleep independently by gradually increasing the time between brief check-ins to comfort a crying child.

Barack and Michelle Obama once had a pretty major disagreement on something known as the 'Ferber Method' when raising their two daughters (Instagram/@‌michelleobama)
Barack and Michelle Obama once had a pretty major disagreement on something known as the 'Ferber Method' when raising their two daughters (Instagram/@‌michelleobama)

It's basically a version of 'cry-it-out', but with intervals where parents briefly check on their child with an eventual goal of teaching self-soothing which will, in turn, enable the child to fall asleep without relying on external comforts.

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Haidt was discussing how he 'ferberised' his son when Michelle admitted that she and Barack, 63, 'did the same thing'.

However, the 61-year-old Becoming author confessed that she and the former POTUS did not initially see eye-to-eye on the approach.

"I didn’t want to do it," Michelle said. "Barack did it and I don’t know that I could have done it because I wasn’t sure about it - the notion that you just let the little person that you love cry and cry."

The Obamas share two daughters; Malia, 26, and Sasha, 24 (Instagram/@barackobama)
The Obamas share two daughters; Malia, 26, and Sasha, 24 (Instagram/@barackobama)

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Michelle recalled how she 'couldn’t even' deal with the thought of letting her little ones cry, floating the theory that it may have had something to do with her oestrogen levels post-partum.

"We set it up where Barack took the night shift. I went to bed, which was helpful because it got me some sleep," she continued, sharing that she would 'literally' cover her ears so she wouldn’t hear her daughters crying at night.

"It took no longer than a week [for the method to work] and it was really after the first two nights, because we started early," Michelle admitted.

The couple tried out the Ferber Method after weaning one of their daughters off of breastfeeding at about four or five months old, Michelle explained, adding: "It was very early so she learned quickly.

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"The sooner that you start, sort of, removing the symptom, the quicker you start to implement the action, the more responsive the child is sooner."

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