| Last updated
Sometimes social media can feel like a dark and depressing place, but then, every now and again, you come across something so hilarious it makes it all worth it.
Enter actress Daisy May Cooper, and her rendezvous with an Instagram troll posing as a sea captain.
Catch a glimpse of their exchange here:
You might remember Daisy from BBC's This Country, or for her absolutely iconic lockdown dancing on TikTok.
But her 'love story' with Jon the sea captain has now become so infamous that it has made it onto her Wikipedia page, and taken the internet by storm.
The star crossed lovers kicked off like so many online flirtations do, with a casual DM side.
The Instagram scammer wrote : "Hi and how are you?"
It was quite clear that the sea captain might not actually be who he says he is (sorry, Daisy!), but, after some gentle encouragement from her followers, she decided to reply anyway, playing the catfish at his own game.
"My profile pic got this middle aged sea captain like "DAMMMMMmmmmm" Shall I reply?" Daisy wrote.
The actress started by sending him a picture of herself on the sofa with a watermelon slice to her ear, as if she was on the phone.
Then, she sent him a photoshopped image of Jack and Rose from Titanic, writing: "This cud be us".
Clearly not put off by her flirtations - if a little blunt - he replied: "Ok fine, what is your name and where are you from?"
Be warned: from here on out, it all just gets sillier and sillier.
Daisy went on to tell the Insta-fraud she was the heiress to a dog going company making bull mastiff clones.
Revealing some top-secret info about himself, the sea captain then said he was from 'Georgetown, USA,' but is currently "deployed to Syria" for an undercover mission.
If that were true, sea captain, we think you should be keeping it to yourself!
His typos made the whole thing even funnier. "I am an office in the US Army," he added in his message. Yep, a literal office.
It's at this point that the sea captain realised Daisy was sharing their conversations on her main Instagram grid.
"Why do you post our conversation on your page? Stop doing that please. I told you I'm under covered mission. I'm not suppose to be seen chatting online," he said.
This was the first bump in the road, and from then on, it deteriorated into utter madness.
"Guys, I want you to be the first the hear it from me. But the sea captain has dumped me," Daisy later updated her fans.
"He asked me to lend him £1000 and I just don't have that sort of money. I shouldn't have lied about being an heiress at a dog cloning company.
"I should have told him the truth, which is Im just a humble cloner working for DOGSCLONE inc. I'm gonna be too upset to post for a while".
But the break up was only short lived, and after a few grovelling messages and a link to Daniel Bedingfield's 'If You're Not The One,' the sea captain was won back round.
"Listen to this," she wrote. "Please I'm falling apart here."
She then asked him: "Can we start again?," to which he replied: "Yes fine".
Ah, the romance.
It's at this point the sea captain's intentions start to look a little questionable.
He tells Daisy he has a favour to ask, which she instantly assumes is a proposal, and accepts.
But what he's actually asking for is $953, which he wants her to send through a Western Union account, so he can 'have an operation'.
Concerned about her love, Daisy offers to sell a bunch of accidentally cloned bull mastiffs to pay for the op.
But the sea captain wants the cash immediately, and even threatens to "call the cops" on her if she doesn't oblige.
"I have your records on file, you owe unpaid taxi... taxs," he wrote.
Queue the hundreds of memes about Daisy owing Taxi taxes....
Phew, still with us?!
The sea captain then returned from patrol, dismayed at the messages in Daisy's inbox.
'Hello dear... this was no me dear," he penned. "Bad men came when I was out for petrol and rob the computters".
He then denied having ever asked Daisy for money, adding: "Thank god no one hurt".
But, we reckon by this point he was starting to get suspicious of the This Country star, as this morning she took to Instagram with a poignant update.
"It is with a heavy heart that I break this news to you all. I woke up this morning to find that my dear fiance seacaptain has deleted his account," she wrote.
"I can only assume the worst, which is my dear sweet under covered office met his grizzly end at the hands of the bad men/did not survive patrol
"I am devastated and hope you will join me here in the comments to Share your fondest memories of jon
"I will always love you my brave seacaptain, may you sail away to the stars".
What. A. Rollercoaster.
Chosen for YouChosen for You
Most Read StoriesMost Read