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Expert shares six things men are desperate for women to do in the bedroom

Expert shares six things men are desperate for women to do in the bedroom

She shared a list of ‘secret sex desires’

An expert has shared the six things men are desperate for women to do in the bedroom – and some are surprisingly straightforward.

Communication in relationships can feel difficult to at the best of times, but when it comes to sex, things can somehow seem even harder – pardon the pun – to navigate.

Of course, we know we shouldn’t feel awkward addressing what’s on our mind, but it’s certainly easier said than done.

But one psychologist has shared six things men are secretly looking for when the time comes to get intimate, having shared a set of ‘secret sex desires’.

Author and radio presenter, Dr Pam Spurr, spoke to The Sun about what your other half might be after, from nicknaming their manhood to paying them lots of compliments.

Pam Spurr says there was six 'secret sex desires'.
Andrea Piacquadio/Pexels

For starters, according to Spurr, many men ‘hate initiating sex all the time’, and often end up feeling like they’re pressuring their other half.

Instead, what they ‘really want’ is for you to subtly hint to them that you’re in the mood to get down to it, although Spurr says ‘not so subtly’ also works too...

She said men also like it when they get ‘bigged up’ in the bedroom, meaning they’re essentially after ‘loads of compliments’ while getting down and dirty. Sigh.

Spurr advises: “So tell him how you love it when he flips you over into doggy position. Or when he kisses you passionately. Or when he does a jokey Full Monty strip around the bedroom for you.”

She continued to explain how some blokes tend to go a bit quiet as they reach orgasm, at which point Spurr says they probably want you to do the same.

Apparently, it’s all about them just needing a bit of concentration to get there, meaning you don’t necessarily need to be screaming in their ear all the time – all you have to do is respect the silence if that’s what they need.

Dr Pam Spurr.
GB News

She also recommends having ‘fun’ nicknaming their penis, saying fellas ‘secretly love it’ when they’re given sexy names like ‘the jackhammer’ or ‘Captain Stud’.

As for number five, Spurr says 'don’t be direct if they’re not erect’, saying many men prefer to ‘keep it chilled’ and talk about it at a later time.

Finally, the expert recommends you DO consider their... ahem... anal pleasure.

"Loads confess they’d secretly love a little ‘fingertip prostate stimulation’ either during foreplay or full sex,” she said, suggesting slipping a condom, latex glove or even some strong cling film on your finger and teasing his ‘forbidden’ area.

“It’s a complete myth he has gay tendencies if he wants prostate stimulation,” Spurr adds.

“It gives men mega-powerful orgasms and straight guys are waking up to this.”

Pam Spurr’s Six Secret Sex Desires:



  • Take the lead
  • Big them up
  • Respect it if they go quiet
  • Have fun nicknaming their penis
  • Keep it chilled if they don't get an erection
  • Fingertip prostate stimulation
Featured Image Credit: RealPeopleGroup/Larry Washburn/Getty Images

Topics: Sex and Relationships, Advice