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How to tell if you’re falling victim to latest dating trend ‘roaching’ as Gen Z are issued warning

Home> Life> Sex & Relationships

Published 11:42 18 Jul 2024 GMT+1

How to tell if you’re falling victim to latest dating trend ‘roaching’ as Gen Z are issued warning

Experts say 'roaching' is more common than people think

Mia Williams

Mia Williams

Featured Image Credit: Getty Stock Images

Topics: Dating, Dating trends, Sex and Relationships, Advice

Mia Williams
Mia Williams

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Gen Z have been warned about 'roaching', a trend which could leave you feeling unsatisfied while dating.

The dating terms just never seem to end these days - from ‘orbiting’ to ‘contra-dating’ - we really can’t keep up.

The dating game can be a tricky one to navigate, deciding who messages who first, playing it cool but not coming across like you don’t care, it’s a minefield.

Gen Z are being warned about 'roaching'. (Peter Cade / Getty Images)
Gen Z are being warned about 'roaching'. (Peter Cade / Getty Images)

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Unfortunately there’s a new red flag on the block, and it's called 'roaching'.

The name comes from the idea of when you see one cockroach scuttling around, it usually means there is an infestation following behind.

And you can probably work out that ‘roaching’ is a similar concept.

It is where a partner decides to be dishonest, and hides the fact they are seeing you alongside multiple other people while you're still dating.

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As per The New York Post, Exclusive Matchmaking CEO Susan Trombetti said roaching is: “Inspired by the ickiness of seeing one of these nasty little bugs - but knowing when you turn the lights on, there are lots of them.”

Now while some of you might be thinking 'just call it cheating?' - technically if you and your potential partner haven’t had the exclusivity chat, you’re well within your right to date more than one person.

It’s just not exactly nice.

Experts say 'roaching' is more common than people think. (raden yogana/Getty Images)
Experts say 'roaching' is more common than people think. (raden yogana/Getty Images)

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And according to Forbes, there are a few telltale signs you can look out for...

Secretive behaviour

If the person you're dating is particularly secretive about aspects of their personal life, it could be a sign of 'roaching'.

This is especially regarding their potential romantic interests, it's important to keep an eye on cagey behaviour!

Lack of commitment

This is a red flag in any relationship, but a partner leaving you uncertain about where you stand is not fair.

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This could be a sign of being 'roached', because they can't choose to commit to you exclusively, thus leave you in a 'state of uncertainty'.

Inconsistent communication

If the person you're dating disappears for abnormal amounts of time, and comes back with a flaky, half-hearted excuse afterwards, it could be time to call it quits.

If you spot any of these signs, you could be a victim of 'roaching'. (Getty Stock Image)
If you spot any of these signs, you could be a victim of 'roaching'. (Getty Stock Image)

Unexplained changes in plans

Could their 'side ting' have just called for them to come round? You'll literally never know if they're being completely genuine.

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Of course sometimes plans change last minute, but when this becomes a habit, it could be time to re-think your situation.

Mixed signals

If you feel like you're being left hanging constantly, or they tell you one thing and do another, you could be a victim of 'roaching'.

In addition, senior therapist Sally Baker told Metro that you should look for ‘giveaways in body language’.

“Most people are uncomfortable telling lies so they will subconsciously give clues either verbally or physically that they’re not being transparent or completely honest,” she explained.

Sally explained that it’s hardly worth requesting exclusivity from a partner if one of you is maintaining a secret social life anyway, so you might have had a lucky escape after all!

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