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Topics: Dating, Dating trends, Sex and Relationships
Niamh Spence
Topics: Dating, Dating trends, Sex and Relationships
Dating trends come and go, and to be honest looking for love can be downright exhausting.
We've all been there, swiping left and right and seeing what feels like the same old matches come up time and time again.
It can feel like dating is a slog, and that there isn't much else to do but stick at it and hope the love of your life comes in soon.
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Yet a new dating trend called 'contra-dating' is thought to be the perfect antidote to finding a dating match.
According to the dating app Plenty of Fish, which was the first to notice the trend among its users, contra-dating involves doing the opposite of traditional dating.
This means switching up your profile to have opposite or different likes and hobbies to your usual ones, and this will help you to find people outside your normal 'type'.
Is it technically lying? Well yes, but rather than totally catfishing someone it's more telling them you're into hiking and camping when you're potentially more of a city dweller and prefer finding cocktail hotspots to nature hotspots.
Also it's less lying and more playing the game to push the dating app algorithms to show you more than your typical matches.
Jeff Yoo, a License Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) at The Moment of Clarity Mental Health Center, spoke to Poosh and put our guilty conscience at ease. He explained: "Having a specific ‘type’ can limit your dating pool.
"Contra-dating challenges those preferences.
"It gives new meaning to being open-minded and willing to learn the importance of core values that matter more than physical attributes."
So think less lying and telling people you're a millionaire or that you're a NASA scientist, and more just bending the truth around your hobbies and interests. Consider swapping out Taylor Swift and the Barbie movie and add in some indie bands or a foreign art film, and see if it throws up a different set of dating options that your usual choices.
The worst case scenario could be that the choices still don't feel right, and you can consider switching your interests and profile back to what it was before. Yet according to Glamour magazine: "You can, of course, change your interests back, but it's important to view dating as an oppourtunity to get to know lots of people with different interests that you would never have met otherwise. Because if you remain open to and interested in other people, you'll discover new sides to yourself and the people around you."