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In the immortal words of Adam Levine: "it's not always rainbows and butterflies, it's compromise that moves us along." Sure - a pre-nup isn't romantic in the traditional sense of the word, but they are increasingly common and, when used in the right way, can protect both of you financially if the worst happens.
But despite claiming she's "all for them", onebride-to-be has found herself a little surprised and a lot concerned about some of the clauses her successful neurosurgeon fiancé included in the contract he presented her with.
When she went through the legal document with her fiancé's father, who's a lawyer, alarm bells started ringing loud and clear.
The alarmed, embarrassed and blushing bride turned to Reddit (where else) last week for some casual legal advice - because, she for sure couldn't rely on her dad-in-law for impartial advice.
"My fiancé put a few odd clauses in our prenup, such as an infidelity clause so if I cheat on him, I walk away with basically nothing," she began.
Not surprising for someone so successful in their field - but that's not the part of the pre-nup she's taking issue with.
The "oddest of them all" to the future bride is the "compensation for children clause."
She explained: "I am not sure if I interpreted this correctly so anyone may correct me, but in the prenup my fiancé mentioned that for every child I have for him, I get a chunk of money., which to me doesn't sound legal but maybe it is?"
But that's not the worst of it. Her prince charming husband-to-be then added in a weightloss clause.
"He put in a clause that stated that I have to lose any weight I gain after child birth, at least 30lbs of it in the first year following childbirth."
To be clear that's 13.6kg or over 2st in 12 months
According to post-natal experts getting your body back to "normal" (whatever that is) safely and healthily after having a baby can take between six to eight months. But it could take longer - and, for some, it might not even be possible. You do you, hun. Especially when you've just pushed another human out of yourself.
When asked what measures would be in place to track her weight she clarified: "A few, I would weigh myself the day I find out I am pregnant and then at the peak of my pregnancy I weigh myself once more, the difference would be the weight I have to lose a year from the birth date of my child, then I'd have to weigh myself again and confirm that I did lose that weight."
The now-closed Reddit thread got a bit extra with some offering legal advice and others commenting on her relationship.
There were also some valid points about making sure the clause went both ways.
One Reddit user said: "I would add to it that if the husband also gains 30 pounds and does not lose it within a year then it invalidates the requirement on her. It should be equal on both parties. Same thing with the cheating clause and any other rule."
While another added: "You can also make him sign some conditions. Eg. If he goes bald, he needs to pay you some amount. If he is unfaithful, all conditions of the prenup are null and void."
A third said: "I were in your shoes, I'd want a counter clause saying that he needs to provide childcare and a personal trainer, nutritionist and chef to come to your home while you're trying to meet his unrealistic expectations."
But the responses were unanimous in their main advice.
One said: "Hire your own lawyer."
While a second said: "You need to get your own attorney, that has no affiliation with your husband or his family."
A third hit the nail on the head: "Consult your own lawyer. The father is not your lawyer. I suspect he is also not a family practice attorney because if was and he's representing his son (which would be a BAD idea in any case) he would never try to put these clauses in AND he would insist on you getting your own representation (even to the extent of telling your fiance to pay for one). Why? Because the inevitable challenge to the prenup upon your divorce (because you're marrying a cad) is a lot more likely to be successful if you didn't have legal representation and especially more likely if there are particularly onerous clauses and with some holding out as if you are being given legal advice by your future father-in-law.
"That said, none of that means you WILL be successful in challenging the most important parts of the prenup and it will be exceedingly painful to do so. So lawyer up. You cannot afford not to.
"Also, you know... don't marry this guy."
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