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Dating expert reveals how many dates you should go on before sleeping with someone

Home> Sex & Relationships

Published 17:36 31 Mar 2023 GMT+1

Dating expert reveals how many dates you should go on before sleeping with someone

A dating expert has shared his opinion on how long couples should wait

Claire Reid

Claire Reid

A dating expert has shared what he reckons is the ideal number of dates you should go on before you sleep with someone.

Jacob Lucas, 30, is a dating coach, helping people with their relationships day in and day out, meaning he should be pretty well placed to reveal how long you should hold off before going all the way.

And it seems as though Jacob, from Wiltshire, thinks that the more traditional ‘three dates and it’s show time’ is better than making someone wait longer for the sake of it or rushing straight in.

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The dating coach said: "I tell all my clients, wait until the third date before having sex.

"If you want something long-term but have sex straight away, there isn't a chance to build emotional intimacy - it's just physical.

"If you just stop sex altogether, you're putting all the emphasis on sex, but the core of it is the emotional connection.

"A lot of my clients who wait until the third date end up in long term relationships.

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Jacob Lucas is a dating coach.
SWNS

"If you want a relationship but you have sex too soon, it just won't last - you need to get to know them.

"It's an old method, but it works, and sometimes things don’t need to be fixed."

Jacob went on to explain that the recent trend of people opting to go 'celibate' for a period of time can be harmful in the long run.

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He believes it won't fix any issues in the long term and when you go back to dating you'll just make all the same mistakes as before. Not ideal.

So instead, Jacob recommends people should set boundaries and change their perspective on sex.

He said: "Going celibate means hyper-fixating on sex as the only goal of your dating life.

The dating expert has shared how long he thinks couples should wait before having sex.
Albert Shakirov / Alamy Stock Photo

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"You need re-evaluate how you see it - and see it as something you do with someone you actually like."

He said waiting three dates will also reduce the chance of being ghosted - because they'll see you as ‘relationship material’ rather than just having a ‘casual thing’ - and your partner will see you’re serious about something long-term.

Jacob said: "If you meet someone new, and you're having sex too fast, you can't expect that person to go for a long term relationship.Because then, you have set the foundations as just sex.

"Waiting three dates means you have time to form an emotional bond rather than it being just physical."

Featured Image Credit: SWNS / Albert Shakirov / Alamy Stock Photo

Topics: Sex and Relationships

Claire Reid
Claire Reid

Claire is a journalist at Tyla who, after dossing around for a few years, went to Liverpool John Moores University. She graduated with a degree in Journalism and a whole load of debt. When not writing words in exchange for money she is usually at home watching serial killer documentaries surrounded by cats.

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