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Expert explains why women are so grossed out by the 'boyfriend air' trend

Home> Sex & Relationships

Published 12:46 22 Jun 2023 GMT+1

Expert explains why women are so grossed out by the 'boyfriend air' trend

A dating coach explains the viral dating trend

Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle

Get ready people - there's yet another dating trend that we've all got to wrap our heads around once again.

From 'breadcrumbing' and 'submarining' all the way through to 'snack dating' and even getting 'zombied' - there's a brand-new piece of jargon to come to terms with in yet another tireless hope to explain the sometimes weirder than wonderful world of romance.

And trust me - it can be weird.

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An expert has explained the new TikTok 'boyfriend air' trend.
TikTok/@notsophiesilva

Ever hung out with your partner and found you look a tad - let's just say - dishevelled afterwards for seemingly no reason even without any bedside antics?

Well, you're not alone as millions of others report the same phenomenon dubbed 'boyfriend air'.

But, if you've been living under a rock and the phrase has somehow passed you by then not to fear as a relationship expert has offered up her expertise to explain what on earth it even is and why so many women are grossed out by it.

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But first, let's talk about the war stories from the women who have first-hand experience of it.

People all over are flocking to TikTok to share their own personal run-ins with the dreaded 'boyfriend air', with many showing side-by-side comparisons of what they look like before hanging out with their beau and then right after.

People are flocking to TikTok to share footage of their experiences with 'boyfriend air'.
TikTok/@notsophiesilva

One TikTok user claimed: "Bf air is so real, how do I come home looking like I was in a tornado every time?"

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"It’s a real and sad thing," penned a second.

Another revealed: "After I go to his house I look dead."

Talking about the theory, a final believer added: "Unfortunately, can confirm."

Sound familiar at all?

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Kate Mansfield, the UK's premier dating and relationship coach who also won relationship expert of the year back 2019 with Corporate Live Wire, told Tyla all the details about the latest viral buzz word.

She defined 'boyfriend air' as a term to describe how spending time with your boyfriend can leave you looking dishevelled and not as put together as usual.

Wondering if you've ever fallen victim to 'boyfriend air'?

Key 'boyfriend air' indicators include 'messy hair' and 'dry skin'.
TikTok/@nishix

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Kate outlines certain tell-tale signs of having experienced it, namely 'messy hair, dry skin, the smell of cheap soap - or even worse, boy BO, day-old make-up, baggy T-shirts and trackies'.

Sound familiar?

You, my friend, may have some first-hand experience of 'boyfriend air'.

But why do so many women - and according to TikTok there's millions - share such similar experiences regarding 'boyfriend air'?

Well, Kate says the phenomenon comes as a result of women being able to relate to 'staying over with their boyfriend'.

Doing so may entail a 'combination of bad bathroom products, less time spent on hair and make up, and the after effects of rolling around in the bedroom' which all, understandably, can leave an individual looking 'a little messy'.

The dating expert puts 'boyfriend air' down to a whole bunch of reasons.
TikTok/@nishix

So, instead of your 'messy' appearance being down to the literal 'air' that a boyfriend exudes, Kate explains the phenomenon can be down to just a handful of quite plausible reasons.

Kate has since shared some key tips and tricks on how to go about minimising the effects of 'boyfriend air'.

"Bring your own products and a change of clothes," she advises or simply just 'get him to stay at yours'.

Kate adds: "Make time to gather yourself and put yourself together as usual regardless."

It is important to note that while the 'boyfriend air' trend largely centres on heterosexual couples on TikTok - no one is safe.

Same-sex couples have also shared their own experiences with the strange occurrence.

One woman posted to TikTok: "Y'all talking about bf air but gf air is worse."

"I don't dress up or even care to do my hair," she added.

While the hashtag is going viral with many weighing in on the theory it's clear that others, however, were not so convinced.





One TikTok user claimed: "You guys there’s no such thing as boyfriend air. Your boyfriend just needs to wash his pillowcases."

Ouch.

"It just comes down to not having your things at their house (makeup remover, brush, shampoo, etc) and your comfortability with the person," a second wrote.

A third called the concept 'so silly' before adding: "I think we just get overly comfortable around our partners and don’t strive to look as presentable as we used to."

"It’s not the air," echoed a final non-believer. "It’s the fact that I don’t feel the need to look any type of way, I can just be my raw self."

What do you make of it?

Featured Image Credit: TikTok/@notsophiesilva

Topics: Sex and Relationships, TikTok, Life

Rhiannon Ingle
Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle is a Senior Journalist at Tyla, specialising in TV, film, travel, and culture. A graduate of the University of Manchester with a degree in English Literature, she honed her editorial skills as the Lifestyle Editor of The Mancunian, the UK’s largest student newspaper. With a keen eye for storytelling, Rhiannon brings fresh perspectives to her writing, blending critical insight with an engaging style. Her work captures the intersection of entertainment and real-world experiences.

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