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‘Disgusting’ act of ‘cookie jarring’ is not going down well with Gen Z

Home> Life> Sex & Relationships

Published 12:27 15 Jul 2025 GMT+1

‘Disgusting’ act of ‘cookie jarring’ is not going down well with Gen Z

Singles, beware! Dating experts are warning against a new worrying trend...

Madison Burgess

Madison Burgess

Just when you thought the dating scene couldn’t get any worse, another toxic trend has popped up - and Gen Z victims of it are not impressed.

How people act in relationships has evolved and it’s not just the age-old issues like cheating and ghosting people need to put up with anymore.

From getting ‘zombied’ to ‘roaching,' it feels like in recent years, there are an endless number of ways things can go wrong - and honestly, it’s hard to keep up with them all.

The newest one may even take the cake for one of the worst, as you don’t really know it’s happening to you until it’s too late.

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Dating experts are now warning Gen Z against ‘cookie jarring’ - and no this is unfortunately not referring to sweet treats.

Those familiar with the dating scene will know that it’s not usual for singles to date a number of different people at once, with the end goal of eventually settling down into a relationship with one of them.

There's a new dating trend that's popping up more and more - and it's not a positive one (Getty Stock Image)
There's a new dating trend that's popping up more and more - and it's not a positive one (Getty Stock Image)

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with this - but ‘cookie jarring’ refers to when you keep one specific person on the back burner as a ‘backup’ or ‘second option’ in case things go wrong with your first choice partner.

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It’s when someone is purposefully kept around simply as a security blanket and to make sure the main dater doesn’t end up with no-one. Cruel, right?

The person who’s being ‘cookie jarred’ will have no idea that they’re not number one and so will likely be left heartbroken after they’re tossed aside.

Speaking on this worrying new trend on TikTok as per MailOnline, Positive Psychology Coach Arrezo Azim has warned people against doing it.

They said: “Let's be honest, you're keeping them on the side because you want to have somebody else as back-up in case this doesn't work out.

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“Don't jump right back into the dating world, or start talking to someone from the past, or start talking to someone new.

“I don't care if they reached out to you. Give yourself time when you're not getting external validation from something or someone else.

'Cookie jarring' means to cruelly keep someone around as a second option (Getty Stock Image)
'Cookie jarring' means to cruelly keep someone around as a second option (Getty Stock Image)

“It's hard but if you want something healthier than the situation that did not work out, then don't shoot yourself in the foot.”

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The expert added: “The attention's amazing - but the long-term effects are a lot worse if you do it that way.”

And the advice comes at a time when it seems like more and more people are falling victim to this trend.

Writing in the comments of another TikTok about the trend, one social media user wrote: “Literally just happened to me just for her to get back with her ex.”

A second added: “Just happened to me, my ex left me for another guy but came back to me through conversation just for emotional support.”

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“This is like "the spare key under the doormat" analogy. You're hopefully not needed but kept around just in case,” wrote a third.

Others joked: “I guess I live at cookie jar lane” and “Beware of the Cookie Monsters.'”

Featured Image Credit: Getty Stock Image

Topics: Dating trends, Gen Z, Sex and Relationships, Social Media, Life, Real Life

Madison Burgess
Madison Burgess

Madison is a Journalist at Tyla with a keen interest in lifestyle, entertainment and culture. She graduated from the University of Sheffield with a first-class degree in Journalism Studies, and has previously written for DMG Media as a Showbiz Reporter and Audience Writer.

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