Shaughna Phillips has admitted she feels ‘guilty’ about raising her daughter as a single mum, saying she is ‘scared’ about how it might impact her growing up.
Shaughna, 29, recently revealed that she is no longer with Billy Webb, the father of her baby daughter Lucia, and was raising her child as a single mother.
It followed the news that Billy was arrested at the end of January – just three months before Lucia was born – having been charged with possession and intent to supply a Class A drug.
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Speaking on her Oh Baby! podcast with best friend Holly Connolly, Shaughna explained: "I'm going to wear the title as a badge of honour - I don't have any guilt about being a single mum it's just the hand of cards that I was dealt," adding that she felt like 'mum of the year'.
She then jokingly said: "I just hope that one day Lucia doesn't write a diss track about me!"
In a new episode of the podcast, the former Love Island star admitted she was carrying a lot of ‘guilt’ after her relationship with Billy ended, knowing she would now be raising Lucia as a single parent.
“I had a real problem with saying the term single mum to begin with,” Shaughna told Holly and their followers.
“I'm like an unexpected single mum, I guess you could call it. This isn't how I was expecting my first baby's journey to go.
“And I think I have quite a bit of guilt around that. I have guilt around her not having the same upbringing that I had.
“It's just something that obviously she doesn't know now, but one day she will know.
“And I get scared of what people might say to her in the playground and all of these emotions. I'm literally worrying about what's going to happen in seven years' time.”
She also opened up about her fears that Lucia might one day suffer with her body image, having had to bat off hatred online from trolls commenting about her own weight.
"I've had real s**t in my life that people on Instagram telling me I need to lose weight or going, do you know that you've gained weight?” she said.
“Have I? You're telling me I've gained five stone and I haven't realised. Of course I've bloody realised, okay?
“But it's trying to be present in the moment. Like I've literally said to my friends, I'm not going out until I've lost weight.
“And I know that's such a toxic way to think, but I don't know how to navigate trying to lose weight, trying to look after this baby, trying to do it in the public eye.”
She added: “The thought of Lucia ever thinking that she's too skinny, too fat, she needs to lose weight, ever thinking that she's anything but perfection.
“I'm trying not to cry right now. The thought of her ever feeling about herself the way I feel about myself...”
Topics: Celebrity, Love Island, Parenting
Jess Hardiman