Woman claims moving in with your boyfriend before marriage is 'biggest scam'

It's often said that in life, you should try before you buy.

But not when it comes to living with a partner, if this viral TikTok is to be believed, where a woman described moving in together without a ring as the 'biggest scam'.

Jess, from Sydney, was speaking from experience too and said that moving in with her boyfriend was the 'worst decision' she has 'ever' made.

"Moving in with a guy when you aren't engaged is the biggest scam," she said. "Especially if you're a very traditional and gender role-abiding feminine girl."

She said that the decision saw her perform 'wife duties' on a 'girlfriend salary'.

"You end up acting like a wife but you haven't had that commitment yet," she said.

The TikToker said that, in her opinion, men who already live with their girlfriends won't commit to more because they are already living like a married couple.

"If they don't have to take the next step, why would they do it?" she asked. "That's extra work.

"Men get away with so much by society normalising moving in before there is commitment. They have it so easy - all they have to do is just be like 'oh, let's just try moving in together'."

Jess explained that men and women fundamentally view moving in together differently.

For women, it is a step taken before marriage, but for men, it is 'pretty much the same thing'.

"They won't take that next step, and before you know it you end up being a forever girlfriend," she declared.

As a result of her experience, Jess has now completely changed her approach to dating, and she said that she will never live with someone again until she's had commitment in the form of a ring.

"If I'm dating someone and we're at the point where we're spending more than two or three nights at each other's house a week - I need a ring on my finger or I'm not moving in with you."

TikTok / @jesschantelle

She emphasised this in the video's caption, which read: "This is the hill I will die on."

Jess's video went far from unnoticed on TikTok since it was posted yesterday (5 January), and it has already been viewed over 400K times.

If the comments section was anything to go by, people were divided.

"I'd never marry anyone I hadn't lived with," declared one viewer.

"You don't truly know someone until you live with them," advised a second while a third wrote: "For me it was the other way around, I wanted to live with him first to see if I’d even want to accept a proposal."

A fourth added: "Now imagine moving in with someone for the first time after getting married and they have the worst habits."

However, not everyone was so critical.

One viewer agreed, writing: "Maturing is realising doing things the traditional old fashioned way is best because it protects you."

"Agree 100%!" added a second.

"Learned this the hard way 3 TIMES," shared a third. " Will never move in until married now."

What do you think?

Topics: Sex and Relationships

Emma Guinness

@guinness_emma