Bride and groom divide opinion with ‘Irish goodbye pass’ at wedding
A couple’s controversial wedding night ‘rule’ has sparked debate on social media, with one user branding the to-be-weds’ idea as ‘rude and unnecessary’.
There have been more than 22 million weddings in England and Wales over the last 70 years, according to the Office for National Statistics.
That’s a hell of a lot of cake cutting, spending time boozing with your nearest and dearest, and RSVPs being sent out to get your head around, right?
While some weddings are uber traditional, some like to integrate more modern practices into their Big Days, such as choreographed first dances and unique speeches.
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Last month, a Redditor used the social media site to ask fellow wedding attendees if they agreed or disagreed with a ‘genius’ wedding day idea they’d had.
“I’m thinking about including in the programs given out before the ceremony an ‘Irish Goodbye Pass’, they posted in the popular r/weddingplanning thread.
The social media user said this so-called ‘Irish Goodbye Pass’ would be shaped like a ticket and would instruct guests on how to slip out of their big day, unannounced.
“Irish Goodbye Pass. We are so thankful you are here, and would love to say goodnight to each and every one of you!” the preliminary text read.
“But we also want you to know that if you need to leave and we are busy on the dance floor, it is absolutely OK to send us a text with your well wishes instead of feeling like you need to wait in line to say goodbye.”
The Redditor said they would be speaking to everyone before the wedding reception started.
They also alleged they’d be ‘including expected times of everything’, including their exit, in the program.
The soon-to-be married person reasoned that the ‘Irish Goodbye Pass’ was necessary because they’d been to weddings in the past where the bride and groom had been forced to spend time with people who were heading off, rather than those willing to see the night out.
After laying out their idea, the Redditor wrote they were all ears for anyone who had a ‘different’ tack.
It’s fair to say the post has divided users, with one typing: “Most people will just leave. Absolutely nix the message it’s rude and unnecessary but I understand your thoughts behind it!”
A second echoed: “I don't think you need to address it. There was so much going [on] I don't even remember who said goodbye and who didn't but I know for sure not everyone did.”
“I think that would be odd to give guests permission to leave, they have free will,” someone else agreed.
“If someone locks you in a conversation just give hugs and say you have to get back to XYZ and no one will bat an eyelash.”
Meanwhile, another user has defended the ‘Irish Goodbye’ idea. They typed: “Social battery is why we're Irish Goodbying. It's also why our wedding is small and intimate.
“People online get really entitled about weddings. It's weird to me. The internet will tell me one thing is horrible. My circle will tell me they love it."
After hearing feedback, the original poster revealed they had decided to ‘cut the idea’ for good.
“The primary motivation behind it was out of concern for our social batteries - especially for the groom,” they explained.
“A friend had said that she felt like she spent her entire reception saying bye to people, after spending the whole meal saying hi to them, and I recently came across a video where a photographer made an announcement along the same lines.
“The comment section was also filled with negative viewpoints about it. I was considering if there was a less direct way (than an announcement) ‘Hey it’s absolutely fine if you want to’ so people wouldn’t feel trapped there if they need to head out because of kids/work in the morning/etc.
“I am very thankful for y’all’s direct opinions!”
So what do you think? How would you feel if you received an invitation that instructed you how to leave the party?
Topics: Wedding, Sex and Relationships, Social Media, Reddit
Ella Scott