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Married couple encourage each other to sleep with other people

Married couple encourage each other to sleep with other people

Married couple Cate and Darren swing all over the world and want to break the stigma around non-monogamy.

A married couple who encourage each other to sleep with other people have visited more than 20 countries as swingers.

37-year-old Cate Wander and husband Darren, 47, met 15 years ago in Sydney, Australia and started dating.

For the first five years of their relationship the couple were exclusive, but they eventually opened up to each other about their desires and aspirations, and it turned out swinging was something they were interested in.

The married couple define themselves as 'ethically non-monogamous', which means they'll sleep with other people but always make sure to communicate with their other half about it first.

Since taking up swinging the married couple, who now live in Amsterdam, have travelled around the world to swing in plenty of different countries including the UK, the US, France and Thailand.

Cate said she fell in love with the 'openness' of the swingers lifestyle and wants to tackle what she sees as the 'stigma' around it.

She believes 'non-ethical monogamy', cheating in other words, is something seen as less negative than what she and her husband enjoy doing with each other's consent.

Cate works as a podcaster and gives advice to people interested in swinging.

She said: "The first time I swung I was terrified. There's a really negative stigma surrounding the lifestyle.

"I thought a hairy chested dude wearing a gold chain with a beer belly was going to come out and f**k me."

"It was nothing like that at all there are people from all walks of life, it’s like any other bar except there are playrooms. You drink, chat to different people and dance."

She even quit her corporate career in 2019 to openly identify as a swinger as a morality clause in her job contract had stopped her from doing so, now she runs swingers events in countries around the world.

For their first time joining a swingers club they didn't have sex with anyone, just watching others without joining in themselves to get an idea of how everything went.

Since then they've fully embraced the lifestyle and discovered they liked this whole new world they'd entered.

The couple have said their favourite thing to do when swinging are 'puppy piles', which is where a big pile of people (usually wearing clothes but not always) all cuddle together.

Darren said he was 'scared and excited' when he started swinging, and explained that the couple have laid down a few crucial ground rules for how they approach the lifestyle.

In her videos Cate explains things people need to know about the swingers lifestyle.

He said: "If one of us isn't interested we both aren't interested.

"We come first and each have the veto power to leave a situation or a couple if one of us doesn't wish to continue."

Other swingers have credited the lifestyle as saving their marriage and being really healthy for their relationships as long as each half of a couple is fully committed to trying it.

One of the key things the couple have stressed is that the lifestyle isn't for everyone and interested couples would need to have some 'really hard conversations' before going for it.

Featured Image Credit: SWNS

Topics: Sex and Relationships, Life