‘Lavender marriage’ explained as Princess of Norway is forced to address accusations

The term 'lavender marriage' has been explained as Princess Märtha Louise of Norway was accused of being in one with her husband.

There have been so many terms created for how we get together in relationships but lavender marriage might be one that is thrown about a lot, without much understanding of its meaning or historical context.

When Princess Märtha Louise of Norway and Durek Verrett tied the knot in August 2024, people immediately began to claim that the pair were in a lavender marriage and that it was all a ruse.

However, they have since addressed accusations, sharing a video directly responding to such claims.

But what do we actually know about lavender marriages?

Let’s take a look...

What is a 'lavender marriage'?

A lavender marriage typically occurs when a man and a woman get married.

However, one of the pair tends to be either homosexual or bisexual and uses the marriage to ‘cover up’ their sexuality.

Whether it’s because they feel societal pressures or a lack of acceptance of their true self, the convenience of the marriage allows them to be seen as straight and seemingly evade judgement.

The term ‘lavender’ comes from a blend of the two gender-associated colours, blue and pink.

Jennifer Jacobsen Schulz, a licensed clinical social worker, has explained why some people might want to get into such an arrangement.

“Some couples may prefer a lavender marriage because it allows them to conform to heterosexual norms while still being respected by their partner,” she told Marriage.com.

“This doesn’t suggest that there is anything wrong with relationships that don’t follow the heterosexual norm; it just means that some couples prefer the social benefits that come with a heterosexual marriage.”

What is involved in a lavender marriage?

The term ‘lavender couples’ allows for two people to live as though they are married.

They may live together, share a bed, cook for one another, hold hands and attend couples’ functions together - but are not sexually together.

However, it’s important to remember that everyone is different, and some lavender couples might actually choose to engage in sexual activities as part of their chosen agreement.

What has been said about the Princess of Norway?

The royal couple have been battling rumours that they are supposedly engaged in a lavender marriage.

Their wedding was the topic of a Netflix documentary titled Rebel Royals: An Unlikely Love Story.

The rumour came about when the public learned that Durek identifies as bisexual and was married to a woman named Zaneta Marzalkova from 2005 until they split in 2009.

He was then engaged to a man named Hank Greenberg in between the marriage, from 2007 to 2015.

Some thought his relationship with the princess was a ‘cover up’ for his sexuality, and social media commenters pestered the pair like no tomorrow.

How did they respond?

Addressing the lavender marriage speculation, Märtha Louise and Durek took to Instagram to share a joint post on Tuesday (7 October).

They created a video of themselves both looking at the camera, wearing monochrome outfits.

Then, overlaid text read: "What's a lavender marriage?"

The pair look confused, and it transitions to them both wearing lavender.

Comments then flash on the screen including: "The real housewife of Norway and her lavender marriage."

Another added: "Girl, I don’t know if you know but you are in a lavender marriage."

They look at the comments while ‘Hmm we do like lavender but doesn't seem right’ appeared on the screen.

"Ordinary isn’t our thing," the final text concluded as the couple changed to colourful outfits. "We just love."

They captioned the post: "Thought it was lavender? Plot twist. It’s just love and legacy."