Woman left torn as girlfriend is allergic to dog and wants her to rehome him
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A woman has shared her dilemma after having to consider whether or not to rehome her dog as her partner is allergic.
This is the quandary one woman has recently found, saying she felt ‘stressed’ about the prospect of having to get rid of her beloved pooch.
Taking to the Mumsnet ‘Am I Being Unreasonable?’ forum, she wrote: “I’d like my DP to move in with me and we said we’d do it around June.
“Only issue is I have a dog and we’ve recently discovered she’s allergic. She’s also mildly ocd and struggles with the dog hair/smells. I suspected she was allergic but didn’t want to admit it to myself.
“We’ve discussed rehoming my dog as her allergies are quite bad and she’s also very allergic to dust and my home is a little dusty as I’m more laid back about cleaning (she’s told me this needs to change and I’m actively working on this).”
The woman said she was ‘understandably quite upset’ at the thought of rehoming her dog, having agreed to do so as she wants to marry her partner and start a family with her.
She’d been trying to give the dog away to family so she could still visit him, but their girlfriend had grown ‘frustrated’ with the lack of progress.
“My DP understands it’s difficult with me but sees this as me not being proactive as we aren’t really able to plan her moving in until the dog is rehomed,” she continued.
“We’ve discussed it many times but end up going in circles and she gets teary as I haven’t really put a plan in place. She suggested rehoming him by the end of May as she will be moving in the following month.”
The woman added that she’s ‘afraid’ of being judged by friends and family, asking others what they would do in the same situation.
“Breaking up isn’t an option as she’s the person I want to be with but I’m struggling with the whole thing if I’m being honest," she added.
As always, the Mumsnet community came forward to offer up their help, with one writing sympathetically: “Honestly... I would find this so hard. I really feel for you. I suppose if he went to a family friend and you knew he was OK then that would be some consolation but that would be the only way I could do it. Do you think if you have to rehome him it could lead to some resentment down the line? It's early days really - could you wait another 6 months and then see how it's going?”
Someone else said they ‘genuinely couldn’t rehome their dogs for a new partner, explaining: “They just wouldn’t be the person for me if that was necessary.”
Another asked: “Can your partner see if the dr can help with the allergies so you can try to keep the dog? And rehome only if that doesn’t work? In that situation family and friends will know you both tried and could be more sympathetic about the situation.”
Breaking down her options, one other commented: “Well, I mean you need to break up, rehome your dog, or tell your DP she can't move in as you're not ready to rehome your dog. The last sounds like the truth based on your post, but it does leave your DP hanging around waiting for you to be ready and understandably she might not be up for that.
“You have to actually decide what you want more: your dog or your DP to move in. And tell her your struggling, because what's currently happening is really unfair to her. Obviously she needs to know where she'll be living in June.”
What would you do?