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People swear by ‘Cinderella rule’ for anyone who wants a decent sex life

Home> Life> Sex & Relationships

Updated 16:20 16 Jul 2025 GMT+1Published 16:19 16 Jul 2025 GMT+1

People swear by ‘Cinderella rule’ for anyone who wants a decent sex life

People are using the Cinderella method to schedule sex *and* get a decent night's sleep

Lucy Devine

Lucy Devine

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Featured Image Credit: Disney/Getty Stock Image

Topics: Sex and Relationships, News, Health, Sleep

Lucy Devine
Lucy Devine

Lucy is a journalist working for Tyla. After graduating with a master's degree in journalism, she has worked in both print and online and is particularly interested in fashion, food, health and women's issues. Northerner, coffee addict, says hun a lot.

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@lucedevine

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People are using the Cinderella method to schedule their sex lives.

Tiredness and lack of energy are two of the biggest reasons why some couples struggle to maintain a healthy sex life.

What with parenting, work, social commitments and the mental load of juggling everything, sex can sometimes feel pretty low down on the priority list.

Which is why some people are using the 'Cinderella rule' to schedule sex *and* get a decent night's sleep.

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While Cinderella had to be home by midnight, the rule essentially sees couples setting a 'cut off' point for intimacy, to ensure you also get a decent sleep, too.

Of course, it doesn't have to be midnight, it can be whatever time works for you, but according to Metro’s sex and relationships reporter, Alice Giddings, 10.30pm is a good option.

The Cinderella rule is helping people schedule sex (Getty Stock Photo)
The Cinderella rule is helping people schedule sex (Getty Stock Photo)

“Simply set a cut-off point in your head for when intimacy will no longer be on the cards – this way you don’t have to worry about being exhausted the next morning,” Alice explained.

“My ‘turn into a pumpkin’ cut off is 10:30 p.m., and ideally this is when it’ll be lights out and off to snoozeville. This means my cut-off for intimacy starting is 10:10 p.m. latest."

However, Alice explained that it's important to give your partner a heads up prior to this, to ensure they're up for the same scheduling.

“However, many hours prior to this, you can give your partner indications that sex is on the cards in the evening, but mention in passing the cut-off point," she added.

A cut off point means you'll get a decent sleep, too (Getty Stock Photo)
A cut off point means you'll get a decent sleep, too (Getty Stock Photo)

Recently, one doctor revealed how often people are having sex.

Ian Kerner, PhD, spoke to Healthline about how he responds to couples who ask him how often they should have sex.

He shared: “I’ve always responded that there’s no one right answer.

"When couples stop having sex, their relationships become vulnerable to anger, detachment, infidelity and, ultimately, divorce.

"After all, a couple’s sex life is affected by so many different factors: age, lifestyle, each partner’s health and natural libido and, of course, the quality of their overall relationship, to name just a few

"So while there may be no one right answer to the question of how often couples should have sex, lately I’ve somewhat been less equivocal and advise couples to try to do it at least once a week.”

Sleep deprivation and lack of energy can impact couples' sex lives (Getty Stock Photo)
Sleep deprivation and lack of energy can impact couples' sex lives (Getty Stock Photo)

According to David Schnarch, PhD, his study of more than 20,000 couples showed him that only 26 per cent of couples were having sex once a week, with most having it once or twice per month.

But another study, which was published in The University of Chicago Press a decade ago, found that married couples had sex seven times a month.

A third study which interviewed 16,000 people found that older participants were having sex around twice or three times a month, while younger people claimed to have sex once a week.

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