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Dating expert reveals common mistake men make in the bedroom

Dating expert reveals common mistake men make in the bedroom

Men, listen up!

Intimacy experts have been recommending that women own up to their deepest sexual fantasies and broach them to their partners for decades now.

Despite this, however, being honest and vulnerable about your likes and dislikes between the sheets is be a subject that millions of ladies dread or worse, avoid entirely.

Whether it's in fear of making things awkward or damaging their partner's ego, studies have shown that a huge proportion of women suffer mediocre sex in silence and simply aren't brave enough to lay down the law when it comes to what they want in bed.

That said, one woman overcame her worries this week and asked her long-time husband to 'do whatever you want to me' during the throes of passion.

The raunchy request didn't go down as well as she'd hoped, however, after her husband took her desires more personally, believing she must be getting her kicks elsewhere.

The anonymous story has been exposed by sex and relationship expert Jana Hocking, who, week after week, invites her followers to send her their penile predicaments and bedroom bust-ups, in the hope of offering them some advice.

Dating expert Jana shared the screenshot on Instagram.
Jana Hocking/Instagram

It turns out, however, that the husband in this story is the one who namelessly wrote in, seeking help.

In a screenshot shared by Jana, he is seen to be telling her: "During sex recently, my wife of many years said to me 'you can do whatever you want to me'.

"She's never said that to me before...I know she has been playing with herself everyday sometimes multiple times a day.

"Usually it was only occasionally. Should I be worried she's up to something else?" he asked.

Elaborating on the story in her blog, love guru Jana went on to reveal that this concern from men is something she encounters more than you might expect.

"Why for the love of god would he assume she is cheating? Because men simply can’t read women," she hit out.

Jana explained the situation.
Instagram/Jana Hocking

"As I unpacked this message with some girlfriends I was reminded this is not the first time I’ve been asked if I think someone’s wife is cheating because they tried to shake things up in the bedroom."

She then went on to suggest some of the reasons why the woman in question might have felt that now is the correct time to open up about her sexual desires, the first being that she's likely very, very bored.

"Yes, believe it or not, we women can be a horny bunch," she wrote. "The fact that she’s asking for something new and specific means she’s trying to get herself out of a boring sex rut."

Jana goes on to advise him: "She’s keen to explore her fantasies, so instead of being suss, why not punch your fist in the air in celebration and go with it."

Jana explains there could be several reasons why the woman wants to spice up her sex life.
Getty/Westend61

Her second suggestion is that she's been discussing sex with one of her recently-divorced girlfriends, who is probably enjoying a wild time now she's single.

Jana suggests that these girls could be 'experiencing one night stands perhaps for the first time - new and exciting naked times with men who aren’t afraid to get a little kinky' and that your wife could be jealous.

"Women talk, so it’s highly likely the wife is hearing about all these exciting sexcapades and wants in on the action."

If it's not either of these possibility, dating pro Jana believes it could simply be a case that the woman has done her research and has finally plucked up the courage to bring it up to her hubby.

Jana says men frequently assume infidelity if their partner wants to experiment in the bedroom.
Getty/Meng Yiren

"If you took one look at her recent Google search you would probably discover she’s been on a mission to find out how to approach you with her kink," Jana writes.

"So instead of suspecting your poor horny wife is cheating, how about you embrace her newly found libido and enjoy the side effects that come with it: plenty of kinky bedroom action."

Featured Image Credit: Instagram/@jana_hocking/ViewStock/Getty Images

Topics: Sex and Relationships