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Expert explains why so many people prefer new alphabet dating trend

Home> Life> Sex & Relationships> Explained

Published 15:30 1 Sep 2023 GMT+1

Expert explains why so many people prefer new alphabet dating trend

There's yet another viral dating term to add to the list

Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle

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Heads up! There's a brand-new dating trend that's just entered the chat and people are absolutely loving it.

Now, you've probably heard of submarining, bread-crumbing and even getting 'zombied', but there's an exciting new kid on the block when it comes to the weird and wonderful world of romance.

Thankfully dating coach, Hayley Quinn, has come to the rescue of romantics all over to explain the viral trend that TikTok is currently going mad for, and just why you should be thinking about trying it out for yourself.

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So, first things first, what on earth actually is 'alphabet dating'.

Well, Hayley explains it all comes down to people making a conscious effort to put the spark back into their relationships - whether serious, casual, a situationship - or even a delusionship for that matter.

She told Tyla: "Alphabet dating is where a couple takes turns in choosing a date that's themed by a letter of the alphabet. For whoever goes first that will mean planning a date beginning with the letter A: Think aquarium, art galleries or arcades!"

Sounds simple enough - right?

A dating coach has explained the new 'alphabet dating' phenomenon taking TikTok by storm.
Janina Steinmetz/Getty

But exactly why has 'alphabet dating' become so popular amongst both singletons and couples already in relationships?

"For singletons dating can feel like a slog," Hayley states. "For most people it will mean meeting online, chatting for a week, and then finally meeting up for a quick coffee or some lacklustre drinks."

We've all been there - let's be honest.

She continued: "With all their dates blending into one, injecting some creativity back into the dating process is a smart idea."

The expert says the new trend can help singletons out of a dating 'slog'.
Rob Melnychuk/Getty

And it's just the same for people with long-term partners who may have now 'grown complacent' in their relationships over the years.

Effectively, 'alphabet dating' creates a structure for couples (new and old) who want to make the effort, and commit to improving their date nights.

So, if you're thinking of giving it a spin - you'll be happy to hear there are a whole bunch of other benefits attached to putting the trend into practice.

"Even if you're in a long term relationship, you still need to 'date' your partner," Hayley explains. "If you feel your relationship has recently been lacking the emotional or physical intimacy, this could be a sign that you need to reinvest in bringing romance back into your relationship."

She added: "After a long week it can be hard to be spontaneous, and think of the perfect date on the spot; by using 'alphabet dating' you have to plan your dates, and it also means both partners are equally responsible for choosing their date nights.

'Alphabet dating' can help bring back or ignite a spark in relationships.
cottonbro studio / Pexels

"This is particularly good if both partners have different date preferences - rather than always going out to dinner, 'alphabet dating' also makes you compromise on how you spend your time."

Singletons suffering from dating fatigue should also give it a spin as it can help you to 'find your enthusiasm for dating again'.

The expert pointed out: "Not only do you get to go on more creative dates, but you also get to filter your dates based on whether they're willing to give alphabet dating a try."

Now that's a good tip.

"If they're unwilling to make an effort for your first date, they're unlikely to be someone who is invested in your relationship later down the line," Hayley added.

"Going on novel dates should also help both of you to approach the date with fresh eyes, and make it easier to form a connection."

The expert encourages people to get creative with their 'alphabet dating' ideas.
Tim Samuel / Pexels

OK, OK... 'C' for coffee and 'D' for dinner is all well and dandy but what about navigating those trickier letters that don't have an obviously romantic date idea attached to it?

Don't you worry as Hayley's got a tip for that too: "If you get stuck on a tricky letter don't despair.

"The daters of TikTok already have plenty of suggestions for the trickier letters. For example if you get stuck on 'V' try video games, virtual reality or volleyball.

"As for 'X' if you're already physically intimate this could signal a sexier date plan, or it could be a wildcard letter where you choose any date you want."

Saucy.

Hayley also offered some other outside-the-box 'alphabet dating' ideas to truly make the most of the last days of summer.

"Great date ideas could involve wild swimming, bike rides, picnics, or day trips," she advised. "If you want to keep things closer to home then you can also try craft based first dates - whether that's homemade cocktails, jewellery making or a games night."

Do you reckon you'll try it out?

Featured Image Credit: Janina Steinmetz/Rob Melnychuk/Getty

Topics: Sex and Relationships, TikTok, Advice

Rhiannon Ingle
Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle is a Senior Journalist at Tyla, specialising in TV, film, travel, and culture. A graduate of the University of Manchester with a degree in English Literature, she honed her editorial skills as the Lifestyle Editor of The Mancunian, the UK’s largest student newspaper. With a keen eye for storytelling, Rhiannon brings fresh perspectives to her writing, blending critical insight with an engaging style. Her work captures the intersection of entertainment and real-world experiences.

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