Man says he doesn't want to sleep with wife anymore after she gained 50 pounds and 'let herself go'
Topics: Sex and Relationships
Anish Vij
Featured Image Credit: Vera Arsic / Andriy Popov / Alamy
Topics: Sex and Relationships
A man who claims to still love his wife no longer wants to have sex with her because she has 'let herself go'.
The idea that true love is what the eyes can't see and the hands can't touch is something that will always be up for debate.
When you decide to marry someone, you'd probably be lying if you said that looks don't come into it.
However, each person is different and one anonymous husband has explained his situation by candidly writing a letter to best-selling author Jane Green, who offers advice to married couples.
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In a column written in the Daily Mail, the man claimed his wife 'no longer cared about' how she looked after getting pregnant.
He admitted that 'the awful truth is that I just don't find larger women attractive'.
"I fell for my wife because she was slim and athletic," said the husband.
"She took such pride in her body and her fitness, and now that woman appears to have disappeared forever.
"Now when she wants to have sex I find myself making excuses because quite frankly I just don't want to.
"I don't know how to tell her that she just doesn't do it for me anymore.
"She's a wonderful mother to our son and I admire that so much about her, but I think that sex is a really important part of any marriage and can't see myself going on like this for much longer.
"How can I be honest with her without her hating me?"
The straight-talking author was equally as candid in her response and said: "It is indeed pretty awful to read that you fell for your wife because she was slim and athletic, and took such pride in her body and fitness.
"No mention of her personality, humor, shared interests or indeed anything other than the superficial.
"I wonder what would happen were she to be in an accident where she was disfigured - or how you'd feel if she lost a limb."
While admitting that the husband may have married his wife for 'superficial reasons', Green suggested 'the reasons for her no longer caring about make-up or what she looks like is because she is unhappy'.
"Perhaps she's subconsciously using her weight gain to push you away," Green added.
"Over-eating can often be a way of coping with unhappiness, or attempting to numb feelings of pain.
"Either way, none of us stay the same through the years."
Green advised: "The first is to forget about the weight gain and focus on the things you love about your wife on the inside.
"So the second part of the advice is to ask her, lovingly, how she feels about her weight gain, and try and find out what's going on for her.
"If she is happy as she is, you have your answer. If, on the other hand, she would love to get back to her former shape, you can ask how you can support her."