Featured Image Credit: Twitter
Topics: Real Life
Emma Guinness
Consent is key in any relationship, and that's something one man learned the hard way when he sent a woman a graphic unsolicited message.
Twitter user Becky Holmes told how a man, known only as Greg, had sent her an unwanted picture of his genitalia as a 'birthday present', and she decided to have a little fun with it.
Here's an example of great consent in action:
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Becky, who has something of a reputation for terrorising online scammers, wrote: "Long-term sex pest Greg was kind enough to send me a willy-themed happy birthday message yesterday.
"Unfortunately I was distracted by a mark on his body which I had to inform him was the start of something terrible."
Becky then followed it up with a series of hilarious screenshots that should serve as a warning to anyone planning to follow in Greg's footsteps.
The exchange began with Greg sending her a picture of his genitals poking through a sign that read 'happy birthday'.
She replied: "Greg mate, that's great and I appreciate the effort but I'm distracted by what appears to be a dangerous red mark on your stomach."
Becky emphasised her point by drawing a red circle around the offending mark.
This definitely got Greg's attention, and he speculated that it was merely a mark from his clothes rubbing against his body.
But Becky didn't stop there.
She added: "Greg, I have a degree in dermatology. I've seen these before in that position and it is often a sign of something more serious."
"What do mean in that position?" Greg replied. "It's just a spot, it doesn't itch and I've never noticed it before. How can a spot be serious? You've never had spots before?"
Becky then amped the drama up by urging Greg to 'stay calm for now'.
After more panicking, he wrote: "I was calm, you're not making me calm."
Things unfortunately kept getting worse for Greg when Becky told him that he had a very specific kind of spot that was silently spreading poison throughout his body.
"Greg, I'm so sorry," she wrote. "It's going to be a difficult few months for you."
The would-be suitor got so worked up that he went as far as showing the offending photo to his female cousin for a second opinion.
"We're not an expert like you but she agrees with me, we can't see anything," he wrote, then pleaded, "If there's anyone you work with that could give a second opinion, that would help."
The thread unfortunately ended there, but we can only assume Greg was so upset about Becky's apparent revelation that he sought the opinion of a real doctor.
Reacting to the thread, one Twitter user wrote: "I love how he's appalled that YOU'VE stressed him out, absolutely no thought whatsoever given to how sending his vile pic may have made YOU feel! Incredible."
A second added: "How on earth did he start the conversation with his cousin... Hey, I've been sending pictures of my willy online and...."
"Best tweet I've ever seen," added a third.
Hopefully, a real doctor informed Greg that he had nothing to worry about, and the experience taught him a very important lesson about sending unsolicited pictures of his genitals.