Psychologist reveals three giveaway signs you could be dating a narcissist

Have you ever wondered if the person you’re dating is actually a narcissist?

It’s a daunting thought, but if you have, you’re not alone. A quick Google search of that very question yields more than 20 million results.

A narcissist is simply defined as 'a person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves', but in relationships it doesn’t always present itself as your significant other simply being self absorbed - it can take on a much darker form.

The Mayo Clinic notes that narcissistic personality disorder is a mental health condition that can manifest in having a sense of self-importance that is dangerously inflated, and that people with this disorder may lack the ability to understand or care about the feelings of others.

Now, a psychology professor has explained how to spot if you're in a relationship with a narcissist.

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Professor of Psychology at California State University Dr Ramani Durvasula, sat down with Diary of a CEO's Steven Bartlett to discuss the best ways to accurately spot if you're in a relationship with narcissist.

She claims one in six people are narcissists, making the chances of you dating one worryingly high.

She said: "People in these relationships are confused, they're walking on eggshells. They've essentially modified themselves to be exactly what the narcissistic partner wants. But it's a slow burn."

Durvasula said the three key characteristics to look out for in ourselves are the three Rs.

If you spot any of these three characteristics in yourself, it might be time to consider leaving the relationship.

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Durvasula explained: “The first one is rumination, which is an obsessive thinking about the relationship initially in an attempt to try and fix it.

"Trying to make sense of something that makes no sense.

"The next is regret. The regret that, this is the marriage I created and my child will never get a healthy model of marriage.

"The regret that I have spent 20 years in this relationship and all I have to show for it is a whole lot of nothing.”

Finally, Durvasula shared: “'The last R is euphoric recall, which means people in narcissistic relationships have an uncanny ability to cherry pick the good things that happen in the relationship to keep rationalising it and justifying it to themselves.”

As to how to deal with a narcissistic partner, Durvasula says the best way is to deny them the attention they crave.

She explained: “Not engaging with a narcissistic person is the ultimate kryptonite and not oohing and ahhing over them. Narcissistic people are very used to people oohing and ahhing over them."

Ultimately, it is possible to recover and heal from narcissistic relationships - and Durvasula’s three Rs are great for staying one step ahead.

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