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Warning signs to look out for when dating a psychopath, according to one

Home> Life> Sex & Relationships> Explained

Published 16:55 22 Nov 2023 GMT

Warning signs to look out for when dating a psychopath, according to one

The list of traits is quite harrowing...

Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle

Content warning: this article contains reference to emotional, physical and sexual abuse.

Here are the biggest warning signs to look out for when dating a psychopath, according to one.

Now, it is generally believed that 1 per cent of the entire world's population are psychopaths - but how do you know if you're actually dating one?

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Any singletons out there will know that the dating scene can be stressful at the best of times and downright chaos at the worst.

Many of us will have experience with the dreaded 'Ben stage', being 'vultured', getting 'zombied' and have now figured out the key red flags to look out for when it comes to meeting a potential new love interest. But now, there is one more thing singletons may need to consider, and that's whether or not the person you're dating is a psychopath.

Clinically-diagnosed psychopath, Lewis Raymond Taylor, opened up about the negative ways psychopaths operate in relationships.
The Psychopath Life Coach

Tyla sat down with clinically-diagnosed psychopath, Lewis Raymond Taylor, who is now at the centre of a brand-new chilling Netflix documentary chronicling his life.

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The film goes into detail of Lewis' extremely tumultuous childhood which was tainted by mental illness, sexual abuse, and profound trauma.

By his early 20s, Lewis already received multiple prison sentences for grave offences like Grievous Bodily Harm, but later decided to turn his life around and set up a $25 million (around £20 million) life coaching business and global community spanning 85 countries.

Lewis, 32, has since peeled back the mask on psychopathy and has revealed exactly what negative traits to look out for if you suspect you're in a romantic relationship with a psychopath.

Lewis revealed the negative traits to look out for if you suspect you're dating a psychopath.
Witthaya Prasongsin / Getty Images

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The business mogul told Tyla: "I can't speak from my perspective, because I've always treated woman well, you still have choice.

"Even if you feel like you could act as a certain way doesn't mean to say that you would."

He revealed that he's 'never been a cheater', but that he knows some psychopaths 'would definitely cheat because they don't have any guilt or remorse'.

"They want as much sex as they can get their hands on so why wouldn't they?" he said before adding that 'cheating and lying' were two of the obvious signs.

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However, Lewis went on to explain: "The strongest psychopaths are the ones that you would never know about because they're so good, so intelligent and so charming.

"They're so charismatic, they hide it all so well, they mirror emotions back so well, that you probably think that they're the most empathetic person you've ever met.

Gaslighting and love bombing were listed as key traits to be wary of.
bymuratdeniz / Getty Images

"They will tell you a story and they'll cry and it'll be the most believable cry you've ever seen. But it's fake, they just know exactly how to mimic it [emotions] back."

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Lewis noted: "So if they're truly psychopathic then you will never know."

With that said, the life coach says individuals who are sociopathic or who have a level of psychopathy may exhibit a particular set of common behaviours.

Such behaviours include gaslighting, which is a form of psychological abuse where a person causes someone to question their memories, sanity and perception of reality.

Talking of such people, Lewis continues: "They're clever and manipulative so they're good at making other people feel like they're the problem, not them."

Lewis says people with psychopathic tendencies 'won't understand love in the way that most people understand it'.
Sergio Mendoza Hochmann / Getty Images

Next up is 'aggression and violence'.

"Even if it's not necessarily full-blown aggression or violence, it will be toxic...it will be argumentative, abusive, belittling."

Now, the next one is a word I'm sure we've probably all been hearing lots of over the past few years.

"Love bombing is one," Lewis added.

In case you've not come across the term before, love bombing is a strategic tactic which sees someone 'bomb' you with grand romantic gestures and extreme displays of affection with the future intent to manipulate you.

While it may feel good at the start to be seemingly showered with 'love' and attention, this can shortly descend into gaslighting and other forms of abuse.

The Psychopath Life Coach premiered on Netflix today (22 November).
The Psychopath Life Coach

"At the beginning, they will give you everything that you want because they're manipulating you into feeling like you are the person that they've been looking for their entire life," he said. "And once they've got you in their grip, then, of course, they can get what they want."

But, it's not just cheating, lying, gaslighting, manipulation, aggression, violence, toxicity, belittling and love bombing you need to be wary of.

Lewis says quite a 'unique' sign is that psychopaths 'won't understand love in the way that most people understand it'.

"A psychopath would need to be shown love rather than felt loved," he explains, "If that's not done, it's like, 'Why are you not doing these things for me? Did you not love me?

"Because that's their logical way of understanding that this person cares about them, they don't get that warm feeling.

"That's not registering with them, it always feel as if their partners [are] never doing enough for them."

Now, while all this is very interesting, it's important to note that Lewis is making a generalisation about psychopaths and, of course, every single case is different.

Just like Lewis, there are psychopaths and people who have psychopathic tendencies who choose not to act this way.

The Psychopath Life Coach premiered on Netflix today (22 November) and is currently available to stream on the platform.

Featured Image Credit: Supplied/Netflix

Topics: Sex and Relationships, Mental Health, Health, Life, Netflix, Documentaries

Rhiannon Ingle
Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle is a Senior Journalist at Tyla, specialising in TV, film, travel, and culture. A graduate of the University of Manchester with a degree in English Literature, she honed her editorial skills as the Lifestyle Editor of The Mancunian, the UK’s largest student newspaper. With a keen eye for storytelling, Rhiannon brings fresh perspectives to her writing, blending critical insight with an engaging style. Her work captures the intersection of entertainment and real-world experiences.

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