'I'm Not Having Kids - They're Messy, Expensive And I Hate Their TV Shows'
| Last updated
Featured Image Credit: SWNS
Lorella Palmer, 22, says she has decided not to have children because they are messy, expensive and she hates their TV shows.
She also wants to focus on growing her two businesses which means she would not have the capacity to give children the attention they need.
Her decision is supported by her boyfriend, Callum Page, 23, with whom she has been with for four-and-a-half years.
Lorella, from Erith, south-east London, said: "I just don't want to have kids. I've given all these reasons, but at the end of the day, saying you don't want to have kids should be enough.
"Why would I want to push something out of my hoo-ha and expand my stomach and my cherries and everything else on me that's just going to change?
"My friends are supportive of my decision, but some have said to just give it time and I'll change my mind. What if I don't?
"I'm my dad's only daughter, and he has said that he wants to be a granddad and I'm the only chance he's got to have that."
Lorella said there is a societal pressure for mums to be the main caregivers when it comes to raising children. However, after being raised by her single father when her mum left the family when she was 12 she now has first-hand perspective that dads can raise children just as well as mums.
"Dads are rewarded for looking after their kids but mums are just expected to do it.
"If I wanted to go out with my girls for a night out, and my baby daddy had to look after our child, other people will be like 'Aww, isn't it lovely that he's so hands on?'
"But if he wanted to go out and I looked after the kid, nobody would say the same about me. Mums are just expected to do everything, and if the dad does his normal dad duties, he's applauded.
"My dad was a single dad and did an incredible job of raising me. My mum moved to Australia when I was 12 years old, so I didn't grow up with that mother figure. How would I know what to do if I became a mum?"
Lorella also described some of the specific reasons why she does not want to become a mum.
"Kids are just annoying, they annoy me, in every sense of the word. They have no common sense, they can't drink, they have to go to bed early, they scream, they cry, they annoy me."
Lorella added: "Every time I see a child, they've just got crust round their nose and round their mouth, there's drool, they've got food everywhere and they've got sticky fingers.
"They're just living their best life, they're being kids, but I just want to be wearing a cream dress and not worry! I don't like that mess, stay away from me.
"I hate kids' TV too. Your kid is one, they don't need to watch cartoons - pop on Vampire Diaries please, or Gossip Girl, or Friends.
"We don't need to watch kids' TV, it's boring. I just want to sit downstairs and chat with people without Cartoon Network on in the background the entire time."
Lorella's comments come after the latest census for England and Wales shows the number of under fives fell by 7.6 percent between 2011 and 2021.
Her top reasons for deciding against having children is that she enjoys her own time, money and freedom.
"I think that a lot of people aren't happy to admit that they are selfish, and then they have kids and do nothing but complain," she explained.
"When I say I'm selfish, I mean that I enjoy my own sleep, my own time and my own money, and kids take all of that away.
"Unless you're willing to give that all away, because kids deserve everything if you decide to bring them onto the planet, you shouldn't have them.
"I'm not prepared to give all my sleep, time and energy away, or my money."
The University of Portsmouth law graduate works as an agent for social media influencers. She also has serious concerns about the state of the world. She said: "The world is a really, really bad place - bullying, war, poverty, men with podcasts, a pandemic, the list goes on.
"You can't control that. You can be the best parent ever and your child can seriously still grow up with some bad issues and bad things going on around them.”
Although Lorella admits that her stance on children could change when she’s older, she does not want other women to try and sway her opinion.
"If by some miracle I did have children and actually liked my child, I'd want it to be very equal with my partner in looking after our child, whereas today I feel like dads are always viewed as helping out when they actually look after their kid.
"Having children would definitely be the lowest priority in my life. If I did change my mind on having kids, it definitely wouldn't be until I'm in my thirties."