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Mum brands daughter 'disrespectful' because she hates her name and refuses to use it

Jake Massey

Published 
| Last updated 

Mum brands daughter 'disrespectful' because she hates her name and refuses to use it

Featured Image Credit: Ian Allenden / Alamy Stock Photo / Hager fotografie / Alamy Stock Photo

A mum has branded her daughter 'disrespectful' for not using her full given name - but a lot of people think it was actually the mum who was being disrespectful.

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The mum in question explained that she always introduces her daughter by her full given name; however, the daughter always corrects it and shares her preferred nickname.

The names they're disagreeing over weren't disclosed by the mum, but she opened up about their rift on Reddit in a bid to gauge who's in the wrong.

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Writing on the Am I The A*****e subreddit, she explained: "My daughter goes by a nickname that's a shorter version of her full first name, like Becky instead of Rebecca (fake name but you get the idea).

"I don't mind that she does that, but I'm getting tired of the way she corrects me when I introduce her. I use her full name because that's the name her dad and I gave her, and I don't consider the nickname her real name.

"But when I introduce her, she'll immediately correct me as if I called her a dirty word or something. Then she acts cold and distant toward me."

She continued: "It's really embarrassing because whoever I'm trying to introduce her to sees her disrespecting me like that and it puts a damper on the whole mood.

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"It happened again today and I'd finally had enough. I told her to drop the attitude and stop disrespecting me over nothing.

"She rolled her eyes and then walked away from us and waited in the car. I was mortified and ended up crying in the bathroom."

The mum and daughter have found themselves in a stand off. Credit: Ievgen Chabanov / Alamy Stock Photo
The mum and daughter have found themselves in a stand off. Credit: Ievgen Chabanov / Alamy Stock Photo

She concluded: "I love my daughter but I'm at my wit's end here. I don't see anything wrong with introducing her by her real name and I think she's being oversensitive and rude, but my friend says I should see what other people think."

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And it seems like it was wise advice from her friend, because the consensus from the people of Reddit was that it was the mum who was being disrespectful.

One commenter pointed out how easily the mum's post could be flipped to the daughter's perspective, before adding: "A name is a gift given from love, if it doesn't fit the person they’re allowed to exchange it for one that does fit.

"If the person/people who gave them the gift truly loves them they'll want that person to have one that feels right to them.

"Stop being an over-controlling AH to your child. I have two children, one of whom experiments with new nicknames quite often. I just ask that they remind me what they want me to call them.

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"Respect is earned, not something you get to demand. Your child is a person with their own identity and that deserves respect as well."

The people sided with the daughter. Credit: Richard Newton / Alamy Stock Photo
The people sided with the daughter. Credit: Richard Newton / Alamy Stock Photo

Another agreed: "Your daughter prefers to go by a shortened version of her name - and that's her right. You are the one being disrespectful here - not her."

While a third added: "You are concerned about the 'appearance' of respect but you aren't extending your daughter the respect of using the name she prefers. If your name is Susan and I insist on calling you Sue based on some made-up preference of mine, that would be rude, right?"

Topics: News, Parenting

Jake Massey
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