Nurse Lucy Letby admitted in text messages to friends that she feels ‘constantly guilty’ about one aspect of her personal life.
Earlier this week, 33-year-old Letby was found guilty at Manchester Crown Court for the murders of seven babies and the attempted murders of six others at the Countess of Chester Hospital.
In 2015 and 2016, there had been a significant rise in the numbers of babies who suffered serious and unexpected collapses at the hospital's neonatal unit, where Letby worked.
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She was the only member of the nursing and clinical staff who was on duty each time the collapses happened.
During the trial - which began at Manchester Crown Court last October - the prosecution said the 'cold, cruel and relentless' band 5 staff nurse was a 'calculating and devious' opportunist who 'gaslighted' colleagues to cover her 'murderous assaults'.
The court also heard great detail about Letby’s personal life – including how she was part of a close-knit family as an only child to parents John and Susan.
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While the Letbys were proud of their daughter when she left for university, she said she felt a lot of ‘guilt’ about not returning home after she graduated.
Messaging a friend who had mentioned emigrating to New Zealand, Letby said: “I couldn’t leave my parents. They would be completely devastated. Find it hard enough being away from me now and it's only 100 miles.
“I came here to uni and didn’t go back. They hate it and I feel guilty for staying here sometimes but it’s what I want.”
In a message to another friend, she said: “My parents worry massively about everything and anything, hate that I live alone etc.
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“I feel bad because I know it’s really hard for them especially as I’m an only child, and they mean well, just a little suffocating at times and constantly feel guilty."
Sentencing Letby, Mr Justice Goss said: “This was a cruel, calculated, and cynical campaign of child murder involving the smallest and most vulnerable of children, knowing that your actions were causing significant physical suffering and would cause untold mental suffering.
“There was a deep malevolence bordering on sadism in your actions.”
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He added: "There is no doubt that you are intelligent and outwardly were a very conscientious, hardworking, knowledgable nurse – which enabled you to harm babies for some time."
Topics: UK News, Lucy Letby
Jess Hardiman