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Topics: Life, Real Life, Sex and Relationships, TikTok, Dating trends
Poppy Bilderbeck
Topics: Life, Real Life, Sex and Relationships, TikTok, Dating trends
A new dating trend has reared its ugly head. Question is, have you fallen victim to it or have you even been guilty of it yourself?
As if there wasn't enough to worry about already when trying to find your perfect match - getting the ick, amber flags, red flags, apparently 'beige' flags, ghosting and oh, now fizzling.
Yes, 'fizzling' - it's the latest dating trend to go viral, and is possibly even more painful than being ghosted.
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But what on earth is 'fizzling'?
There's no doubt about it, both ghosting and fizzling are both pretty savage.
One sees you dropped off the face of the earth with no warning or explanation and fizzling? Well, fizzling is when your date slowly weans you off them, putting in less and less effort until whatever relationship you had going on ends up 'fizzling out' completely.
Essentially, ghosting is an abrupt end where they cut ties sharply and unexpectedly and 'fizzling' is a more slow, painful and confusing death.
According to Hinge's LGBTQIA+ DATE report, fizzling 'can be just as painful as ghosting, with a majority (90 percent) of LGBTQIA+ people not wanting someone to fizzle them'.
"Daters would much rather receive a direct text," it notes.
Tawkify - 'America's number one matchmaker' - posted a video to TikTok about the issue, noting signs of someone fizzling are when they 'slow down the communication' and aren't as available to meet up.
"All in an effort to try and get the other person to decide, 'Yeah, okay I'm not interested in this anymore'. [...] And then [they're] not the bad person.
"If you're finding it harder to get in touch, you're being fizzled and take the hint because that person is not worth being in a relationship with anyway because they don't have good communication skills," she adds.
In an interview with the Mirror, Hinge love and connection expert Moe Ari Brown explained victims of fizzling can be left with feelings of 'unworthiness, confusion and self-doubt' if they're 'slowly phas[ed] [...] out without [...] an explanation'.
The victim can subsequently be left 'putting up with breadcrumbs,' sex and relationship expert Rhian Kivits adds.
Fizzling isn't beneficial for the person trying to escape the relationship though either, as it can lead to the victim 'grasping for attention' if feeling insecure - exactly what the fizzler doesn't want.
However, ultimately, if you've fizzled someone or are currently doing so, it definitely says more about you than it does the victim.
"The person doing the fizzling is most likely avoidant and selfish because they're not responsible or secure enough to admit that they’re no longer interested in the connection and they lack care for the way their behaviour makes others feel," Kivits explains.
Brown reminds any dating darters, ghosting guys or fizzling flighters: "If you're not feeling the connection, remember there's another human being on the other side of that screen - and they deserve closure."