Women urged to always have a GTFO fund no matter who your partner is
Topics: Money, Life, Advice, Sex and Relationships, Reddit
Jess Hardiman
Featured Image Credit: Jinda Noipho/Getty Images/Witthaya Prasongsin/Getty Images
Topics: Money, Life, Advice, Sex and Relationships, Reddit
Whether it’s getting out of a job you hate or ending a relationship that really isn’t working, it’s always good to have a planned escape route - even if it’s not one you ever have to put into action.
That’s exactly what women are being urged to do to protect themselves against the future, with their very own ‘GTFO fund’.
It might seem fairly dark to consider how wrong things could go, especially if a situation you’re in seems like nothing but bliss, but it could end up being your most important decision.
After all, in the same way that savings could really help you out if that mortgage goes up, or if your car gets written off, there’s rarely any harm in being prepared.
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The same goes for you, as a person - just like a leaky roof or a sudden redundancy, surely it makes sense to ensure there’s enough cash to tide you over if your personal situation changes?
If you’re au fait with internet lingo, can probably guess what it stands for - Get The F**k Out.
Sometimes also known as ‘emergency funds’ or ‘go funds’, the premise is as simple as stashing away some personal cash in case you may need to use it suddenly.
“Emergency funds are desperately needed by those seeking to leave their abusers, especially now, given the additional challenges presented by the cost-of-living crisis,” Farah Nazeer, Women’s Aid Chief Executive, recently told Cosmopolitan.
Starting a discussion on Reddit a couple of years ago about the topic, one user said the importance of such funds ‘can’t be overstated’.
“Make sure, at all stages of your life and in all kinds of relationship constructs, that you have enough money - that only you can access! - to get safely out of any situation and support yourself until you can get re-established,” they said.
“It's fabulous to be part of a smoothly running team and building financial security with your partner. But life can happen in unpredictable and unfortunate ways, so make sure your F**k Off Fund exists and is a healthy size.”
But others pointed out that a GTFO fund isn’t just to equip yourself for divorce or domestic abuse, as it can be helpful in other circumstances, too.
For instance, your relationship may not end on bad terms, but you still might need to find a new home, or replace the car you used to share with your partner.
One person explained in the comments: “My mother saved the change from the grocery budget for her personal emergency fund for at least 50 years. When she had enough, she would put it in a CD and start a new jar.
“At almost 80 years old she has a really large sum of money, and she is still holding it just incase she needs to strike out on her own. She told me after I had been married for a couple of years and said I needed to fund my own 'divorce' fund - that she had set aside some of her money incase I needed to get out and it was time for me to get my own. (Do this for your children.)
“It’s not just about divorce or protecting yourself from partner violence. Joint accounts can get tied up legally if a person dies or some other unforeseen legal weirdness.”
Someone else said they’d done the same, which came in use when her pilot husband lost his job after 9/11, with two babies to care for.
“I did this for years!” she said.
“I always got an extra $20 cash when I was at the grocery store. I hid it under a stack of plates in my cabinet.”
The woman added: “He was able to find work in another industry for a while, at a huge pay decrease, but that money I put away kept us afloat for almost a year.”