‘Obsessed’ mother reveals bizarre reason for anonymously tormenting daughter as psychologist explains ‘Cyber Munchausen’

Warning: this article contains spoilers for Unknown Number: The High School Catfish

There's been a refreshed interest in the harrowing catfish case of Kendra Licari and her teen daughter, Lauryn, following the release of Unknown Number: The High School Catfish on Netflix last week.

The doc delves into the mother-daughter relationship, which changed forever in 2020 when a then-13-year-old Lauryn and her then-boyfriend, Owen McKenny, began receiving suspicious texts from an unknown number.

There was a brief pause to the creepy messages, but they then resumed in September 2021, with the teens finding themselves on the receiving end of a daily barrage of threats and insults over the next 15 months.

Officials soon turned to law enforcement for help when the messages began containing information that only someone close to Lauryn could have known, with authorities eventually making the harrowing discovery that the perpetrator was in fact her own 'obsessed' mother, Kendra.

Why did Kendra Licari do it?

While the Netflix doc didn't ultimately get to the bottom of the exact reason why Kendra relentlessly tormented her own daughter, Isabella County prosecutor David Barberi believes that her behaviour could be a kind of cyber Munchausen syndrome by proxy.

However, in this case, of course, it was slightly different as it was cyberbullying rather than being illness-related, and as far as we know, Kendra has not actually been diagnosed.

"To give it any sort of medical foundation is a little bit problematic. … But I think that there are elements about Munchausen by proxy - about harming someone to keep them close - that definitely existed," director Skye Borgman said.

Speaking of Kendra, Borgman added: "She does mention in the documentary an assault that happened [to her] when she was right around Lauryn’s age. She talks about how scary that was for her to see her only child, her little girl, growing up, and that’s what she really relates to, and that’s what she believes led her to sending these text messages and trying to keep Lauryn close."

Kendra herself said in the doc: "I started in the thoughts of needing some answers, and then I just kept going, it was a spiral, kind of a snowball effect, I don't think I knew how to stop.

"I was somebody different in those moments. I was in an awful place mentally. It was like I had a mask on or something, I didn't even know who I was."

Lauryn's mother, Kendra Licari, was found to be the perpetrator (Isabella County Sheriff’s Office)

What is Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy?

Educational psychologist, Dr Sasha Hall, explained to Tyla that Factitious Disorder Imposed on Another (FDIA) is the recognised psychiatric term for what was previously called Munchausen’s Syndrome by Proxy.

"In the UK, the term Fabricated or Induced Illness is often used," she continued, before adding: "It describes a form of abuse where a parent or caregiver deliberately invents, exaggerates or causes physical, emotional or psychological problems in a child."

According to the expert, motivations can include seeking attention or sympathy, or replaying unresolved trauma from their own childhood.

"FDIA is rare but extremely serious, and the courts recognise it as evidence of significant harm when there is proof of deliberate fabrication," Dr Hall noted.

In the case of Lauryn Licari, the online harassment she suffered at the hands of her mother could be seen as a psychological form of this type of abuse.

The psychologist went on: "The impact was particularly profound because Lauryn was left unable to feel safe in any of her systems. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs highlights that without safety, higher-order skills such as learning and identity development cannot flourish.

"Bronfenbrenner’s ecological theory shows us that a child depends on feeling safe across all their systems – school, home, peers. Lauryn had no idea who was targeting her, so no system offered safety.

"Discovering eventually that it was her mother would deeply undermine her sense of identity, leaving her to question past memories, relationships and her own narrative of self. This means she will now face the difficult task of re-crafting her own identity in the aftermath of such profound betrayal."

Kendra featured in the chilling documentary film (Netflix)

What happened to Kendra?

Well, in December 2022, Kendra was arrested and charged with multiple counts of stalking and using a computer to commit a crime.

She pleaded guilty to two counts of stalking a minor and was sentenced to 19 months to five years in prison. She was released on 8 August, 2024.

Unknown Number: The High School Catfish is currently available to stream on Netflix.