Ben Affleck admits gay kiss made him realise his ‘internalised homophobia’

Warning: This article contains discussion of discrimination against the LGBTQ+ community which some readers may find distressing.

Ben Affleck has opened up about challenging his 'internalised homophobia' in one of his earlier film roles.

The 52-year-old Hollywood A-lister has starred in some of the biggest blockbuster movies throughout his decade-spanning career, including in famed titles like Good Will Hunting, Gone Girl and Batman vs Superman.

However, it was one of his very first roles that Affleck has most recently reflected on, Holden McNeil in Kevin Smith’s 1997 cult-classic Chasing Amy.

Speaking to GQ in a video interview posted last week (17 April), Affleck shared how starring in the film, which included a scene that required him to kiss co-star Jason Lee, unexpectedly forced him to confront what he refers to as his 'internalised homophobia'.

Ben Affleck has opened up about his 'internalised homophobia' in one of his early film role (Michael Buckner / Contributor / Getty Images)

"I ended up having to confront some of my own internalised homophobia [in Chasing Amy] because I found it so difficult to kiss Jason," the father-of-two admitted. "And I thought, 'This is really embarrassing. Like, this is clearly some internalised thing because why should that be a difficult thing to do?'"

Discussing his thoughts on the flick, which touches of themes surrounding the fluidity of sexuality and emotional complexity between men, Affleck reflected: "At the time, what I thought about it was that it kind of alluded to a spectrum of sexual orientation.

"To me it was very suggestive around the homosexuality between the two friends."

Exploring his character further, the actor noted: "You love this other man. We have friendships with men that we love very much. And it was a way of looking at how that could also be similar to homosexual relationships.

"I thought that was honest."

Ben Affleck in Chasing Amy (1997) (Miramax)

With that said, however, the Academy Awards winner clearly wasn't all that satisfied with his performance.

"I still think I did a sh*tty and unconvincing job at it, and I’m disappointed by that," he confessed, adding that he’d love a chance to do better.

But, he did also outline his hesitation to take on a queer role again today, voicing his concerns over authenticity and representation.

"I don’t want to offend anyone in this direction," Affleck explained.

Regardless, it's evident that the actor remains extremely proud of Chasing Amy's legacy.

"It was a movie that, at the time, sort of felt like it was pushing some boundaries," he said.

"And in retrospect, as often happens, the world has evolved."

Affleck reflected on the role and the legacy of what would go on to become a cult-classic in cinema (Miramax)

After hearing of Affleck's comments, fans rushed to social media to share their reactions.

One fan praised: "Love to see healthy masculinity!"

"Always nice to see when men actually start thinking about WHY they feel the way they do and start working on it," penned a second.

A third chimed in: "Always [sic] love Ben Affleck!!! One of the good ones in Hollywood!"

"Good for him to continue to be introspective," applauded another.

And a final fan added: "Honest and heartfelt. Brilliant!"

If you’ve been affected by any of these issues and want to speak to someone in confidence, contact the LGBT Foundation on 0345 3 30 30 30, 10am–6pm Monday to Friday, or email [email protected]