Woman praised for refusing to babysit newborn grandchild for free
Her daughter had asked if she could babysit as being the higher earner she had to go back to work, but the new grandmother said no
A woman has been praised online after refusing to babysit her new granddaughter for free.
Raising a child is no easy task, and it's not uncommon for young families to go to gran and grandad for a bit of extra support while they readjust. After all, working and juggling a new baby can only makes things even more complicated.
However, one gran has put her foot down and said she won't help out, unless her daughter puts her hand in her pocket and stumps up for childcare.
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Her daughter, 29, took to Reddit's 'Am I the A**hole' thread after asking her mum to babysit her new baby because she had to go back to work.
The new mum explained that both she and her partner work and as she is the higher earner, they can't afford for her to stay at home. In addition, she said the nature of their jobs also mean they can't work from home.
She approached her mum to ask for help as the pair also carry a lot of debt, including medical debt and student loans, and wanted to avoid spending money on childcare if possible. She noted that they also need to save to move into a larger home to accommodate for the new baby.
However, the Redditor said her mum refused to look after the child for free, saying that she was 'too old', and rather harshly added: "If she any my dad were able to work it out, so can we."
The gran also said that if she were to look after the baby, she would need to be paid $20 (£16) an hour, as well as late fees if they didn't pick her up on time.
The new mum posted: "I (29f) asked my mom to help me take care of my newborn so I could go back to work once my leave is up. Mind you, my mom is 64, has been a homemaker/stay-at-home-mom since 1992, and hasn't been part of the workforce since then. She refused, saying she's too old and that she already raised her kids.
"She also added that if I really wanted this baby, then maybe I should have thought about staying home like she did to take care of it while my partner goes to work and provides for us like a 'traditional' family, and that if she any my dad were able to work it out, so can we."
However despite the seemingly difficult circumstances the young family were facing, people on Reddit were quick to side with the grandmother, saying that the original poster chose to have a baby.
One user commented: "Sorry to be blunt and rude but maybe don't have a child if you can't afford to take care of them. And if your plan was always go back to work you should have discussed that during the pregnancy with your mom."
Another wrote: "Your mother is under no obligation to babysit for you. Why are you having a child you don't seem to know what to do with? And why have you not worked all this put before now?"
A third posted: "Holy entitlement, Batman. Your mom is in no way obligated to care for YOUR BABY. It’s generous of her to be willing to do it for pay, and you have the gall to be mad she won’t do it for free?"
However others were more nuanced, with one writing: "You're NTA [Not the A**hole] for wanting it, but she's NTA for not wanting to do it. Go with the daycare, it sounds cheaper and you won't need to duplicate everything."
While another shared: "No, you’re NTA for asking for help, but she can indeed refuse. But your mom is wrong because of other reasons. She’s suggesting you should be a SAHM [stay-at-home-mum]. That’s totally fine, but she doesn’t understand that now is completely different from when she became a homemaker. A family could survive on one income back then, you can’t. Not with they way things are now."
Kit Roberts