Little-known signs you actually suffer from ‘good girl syndrome’
The phenomenon can begin in childhood according to one social media star
Featured Image Credit: advicewitherin/Instagram
Topics: Social Media, Mental Health
Kya Buller
Topics: Social Media, Mental Health
An influencer who prides herself on offering career and life advice to her millions of followers has introduced many to the concept of 'good girl syndrome'.
The internet can be an extremely chaotic place, but within all of the noise, there are kind-hearted people who help their audience feel less alone, sometimes with regards to behaviours they have exhibited for their entire lives.
Erin McGoff, who dubs herself as 'your internet big sister,' took to Instagram to share the concept of the 'good girl theory', and was flooded with thousands of thankful comments from people who feel they now understand themselves better.
She wrote beneath her viral video: "To all my good girl (and good boys) out there - we see you & you are enough!!!"
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The video begins with a child being told: "You are such a good little girl!
"You never cry or complain. You're always just so easy!"
Adolescence then arrives, with a teenager being told: "You are such a good student! Always getting straight A's, and you always have a smile on that face."
An adult is then told: "You are such a good employee. Never needing deadlines."
The adult replies: "Yep, that's me!"
She then breaks character and says: "Hey Erin, why am I so depressed?
"I'm doing everything right", before continuing: "I'm the perfect friend, child, partner, sibling. But for some reason, I'm so unhappy."
Erin then says: "Good girl syndrome", and goes on to explain: "You learned to operate your life in a way that was pleasing to others. The number one priority was making everyone else comfortable and happy. It didn't matter how you felt."
The opposite character then understands they never truly got to know themselves, or what makes them happy or fulfilled in life.
It's then ascertained that they need to go and 'find' themselves in those ways, set some boundaries, and, crucially, understand that it's not their (or anyone's!) job to be good.
Erin then says: "You don't have to be 'good' all the time to be worthy."
One person commented: "This hits home. I always say I will die a people pleaser, especially in relationships, I often feel that I need to prove my worth, and compromise too much of who I am to make others happy. But I am enough. I am older and wiser now, and trying to find a balance. I am definitely doing more things for my joy and fulfilment, not others. Thank you, Erin!"
Another said: "I like how I knew where this was going within the first five seconds of the video. How many exhausted, burned out women can relate to this is pretty sad."