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Women Are Sharing Their Biggest Dating Disasters And They’re Hilarious

Women Are Sharing Their Biggest Dating Disasters And They’re Hilarious

It's no secret that the world of dating is an absolute minefield. Nowadays, if you're not being ghosted you're likely being catfished, dogfished or vampired. It really is a dangerous world out there...

But the one good thing about all these horror dating stories is they make excellent anecdotes - as one woman expertly demonstrated last week.

Showcasing the real beauty of the internet, a woman took to Mumsnet to ask others to anonymously share their most disastrous dating tales.

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She wrote: "I'm trying (and failing) to conceive and need some cheering up, so I wondered if anyone wanted to share terrible date stories?

A woman requested funny date stories on Mumsnet (Credit: Mumsnet)
A woman requested funny date stories on Mumsnet (Credit: Mumsnet)

"I'll start (although it's not exactly what happened on the date, but after), I once went on a date when I was 14 with a guy who was a couple of years older than me. He clearly adored me, to the extent that he declared that he loved me and wanted to spend the rest of his life with me.

These women's dates were not like the movies (Credit: HBO)
These women's dates were not like the movies (Credit: HBO)
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"I didn't enjoy it one bit and then he tried to kiss me, it was awful, all slobbery and wet. He spent the whole date telling me how he loved me and then I got home and found he had sent me 12 red roses for when I got back from the date. He called me every day after and I would get my mum to say I wasn't home."

And the replies certainly didn't disappoint, either.

One woman told how she had one too many drinks on a date and ended up vomiting all over the table. In her horror, she then burst out crying and begun heaving at the sight of her own sick.

One woman recalled vomiting over her date's dinner (Credit: Mumsnet)
One woman recalled vomiting over her date's dinner (Credit: Mumsnet)
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While another recalled how she'd made her date cry by pulling him up on a misogynistic comment. LOL. We have no choice but to stan...

One woman had multiple hilarious stories (Credit: Mumsnet)
One woman had multiple hilarious stories (Credit: Mumsnet)

A third remembered the oh-so-awkward moment she'd run into her date with his wife just hours after they'd met (and no, she didn't know he was married...)

One woman bumped into her date with his wife (Credit: Mumsnet)
One woman bumped into her date with his wife (Credit: Mumsnet)
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As a fourth wrote five words which will stay with us forever. "He burped in my mouth". EW.

This one makes us feel physically sick (Credit: Mumsnet)
This one makes us feel physically sick (Credit: Mumsnet)

As another of our personal favourites read: "I went on a date with a guy who had a few pints while we waited for our meals to come and then he promptly dozed off. I finished my meal before waking him up to say I was going to head home.

"He looked confused and asked if I fancied going somewhere else for a drink. He contacted me afterwards to say how disappointed he was that he hadn't heard from me since the date as he thought we had got on really well (he must've dreamed that bit)".

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Note to self: do not doze off on a date (Credit: Mumsnet)
Note to self: do not doze off on a date (Credit: Mumsnet)

And a fifth woman recalled: "It was a double date. We went to a bar for a few drinks and then headed somewhere else for dinner. On the drive we got pulled over and my date got taken away to do a breathalyser.

"He never came back, they took him to jail! A few days later I had a VM from him saying 'Hey it's me XXX, I'm the one who got the dui on our date? Anyways do you want to go out again sometime? Call me.'"

This double date didn't go to plan (Credit: Mumsnet)
This double date didn't go to plan (Credit: Mumsnet)

These stories sure have made us feel better about our own sorry love lives.

Honestly, if you need something to put a smile on your face we advise giving the full thread a read...

Featured Image Credit: Warner Bros

Topics: News, Dating, Funny, Sex and Relationships, Life

Joanna Freedman

Joanna is a journalist at Tyla with a particular interest in highlighting women's issues and telling inspiring first person stories. She's also their resident foodie, and loves covering exciting new beauty launches, too. Contact her at [email protected]

 

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