These Instagram Pages Will Make You Feel Better About Your Tragic Dating App Chats
Ever match with your absolute dream man on Tinder, only for him to send you an opening line so skin crawlingly cringeworthy that you shudder and un-match immediately?
Or perhaps you've been getting on like a house on fire, but then he drops the fact he has a weird sexual fetish ten messages in, leaving you back at square one... single and dateless.
Let's be honest. Sometimes the world of dating apps can be absolutely soul-destroying.
But fear not. You're far from alone.
Women are now using Instagram as an outlet for their dating woes, sharing screenshots of their worst conversations - and they're guaranteed to make you feel better about your own sorry love life, while simultaneously a little worse about the state of humanity.
One, now viral, page named swipes4daddy is brought to us by a woman named Erika, 25, currently living in East London, who set her age restriction to 45 and over as a funny experiment alongside mates at college.
And the results? Well, they're bad. Really bad.
"I could still father you a child," one man writes in a message screens hotted on the page. "Everything is working very well. If that concerns you".
Meanwhile another - whose profile image is a zoomed in snap of his pouting lips - decides to start the chat with a very interesting piece of general knowledge:
"I know you are vegan but you want to try my sausage and meat balls" a third man pens. An offer she surely can't refuse...
While a self-professed "open minded," "intelligent" guy named Simon opts for a delightful image advertising for girls with "Daddy issues".
Explaining why she opted to make an Instagram showcasing the horrors of some elder men on Tinder, swipes4daddy creator Erika told Tyla that the dating app, and her tongue and cheek responses, are means of "poking fun at those who set the norm".
"I kept the account up because I came to the quick realisation that older men genuinely don't care about anything I have to say as long as I'm young," she said.
"It's hard to speak back to a baby boomer in real life, but on Tinder, I have the power."
Explaining what she wanted her account to demonstrate, she added: "The world revolves around white middle aged men but they are complete fools who don't deserve it".
View this post on Instagram*shouts to his kid in the other room to help him with his phone*
A post shared by Tinder Dads (@swipes4daddy) on
Erika isn't the only one showcasing just how bad some people can really get when they're dehumanised and uselessly attempting to flirt behind a phone screen.
Proving that some young men are no better at mastering the art of seduction, hundreds of people have sent in their own messages in to Instagram account Beam Me Up Softboi - an account with 242,000 followers who share submissions of their most tragic conversations with potential suitors.
From one man who starts the chat by announcing his IQ is "higher than the average man," to another who proclaims he is "too romantic for this reality," there really are some gems on there.
Keeping it about as blunt as you could possibly get, one person's first message is a real corker, simply writing: "You look like you sniff glue".
While another certainly knows how to charm a lady back home while on a trip away to Amsterdam.
Our personal favourite is from this guy, though, who managed to show he was both cultured and frisky in one fell swoop by proposing a night of passion to "Rachmaninov's Piano Concerto no. 2." (It's spelt Rachmaninoff, hun).
Who said romance is dead?
We could go on, but honestly, there's something therapeutic about browsing both accounts for yourself and realising it's not just you that's having no luck on these apps.
If all of these don't make you feel better about that creepy 'hey sexy' message you received last week, we just don't know what will. It really is an inevitability in this day an age.
Discussing how her experiences with men on Tinder has changed her attitude to dating IRL, Erika added that often, "whether they're 30 or 60, men choose to present themselves a certain way - usually with their best face - and say things they'd think women would want to hear. "
"It's made me want more than trying to meet someone online," she concluded. "It's easier to behave badly when you don't have any mutual friends of people in common. There's no one to hold them accountable".
We don't know about you, but this has kind of made us want to delete every last app... at least for a week or so.
Featured Image Credit: PA