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Woman Sparks Huge Debate On Whether To Follow Up After You've Been Ghosted

Woman Sparks Huge Debate On Whether To Follow Up After You've Been Ghosted

The woman asked her followers how long she should wait before messaging someone wishing them luck after they've ghosted her.

Emma Rosemurgey

Emma Rosemurgey

Whether you've been ghosted yourself, or you have a friend it's happened to, ghosting is a pretty grim tradition that's on the rise thanks to online dating and ability to simply block someone on social media.

It's fair to say that the art of ghosting - ie suddenly ending a relationship or friendship by withdrawing all communication, is widely thought of the cowards way out because most reasonable people would prefer to have at least a conversation about it.

However, one woman sparked a huge debate on Twitter when she asked how many days after being ghosted she should wait before texting "Hey, if you not longer want to chat anymore it's totally fine - good luck!"

Two days, or thee, she suggested.

Fashion blogger, Stephanie Yeboah, was inundated with replies mostly telling her 'never,' 'walk away' and 'just block him, sis,' but she didn't seem satisfied by this response.

She added: "So the consensus seems to be never? Even if I quite liked them and was interested in getting to know them more? Hmm."

One woman responded: "If you're ghosted you never write to them again. They've done you a favour of weeding themselves out of your life - do not ever go running after them. He made his intentions crystal clear."

Another agreed, adding: "If someone is willing to disappoint you and let you down as soon as you've met them, imagine what they'd be like to be in a relationship with.

"At a time when they're supposed to be impressing you, they're already comfortable with making you feel anxious and shitty. Let them go."


However, other Twitter users suggested that she might like to send to message for her own peace of mind, or to find a resolution for herself.

"My therapist told me that if you're going to text after being ghosted, do it for your own personal resolution, not for them. If it will make you feel better then go for it," one advised.

Another woman offered an alternative scenario, highlighting the fact that you never really know what is going on in other people's lives.

"Not to be the controversial one, but I messaged my now-boyfriend after a week of what I thought was him ghosting me," she wrote.

"Now we've been together two years. Turns out he was just going through some stuff."

Dating app Badoo's in-house psychologist, Claire Scott, says being ghosted is a by-product of online dating, rather than a reflection of the person being ghosted.

"Ghosting has been going on forever, but apps have expanded the dating pool and created more opportunities for people to meet," she explained.

"Therefore the chances of being ghosted are higher. For anyone who finds themselves being ghosted, don't assume that they stopped talking to you because you did something wrong. It's a by-product of online dating rather than a reflection of you as a person."

I think we can all agree that it still doesn't make it feel any less hurtful...

Featured Image Credit: Pexels

Topics: Life News, Dating, Online Dating, Real, Sex & Relationships