Mum Sparks Debate Over Dads Staying In Maternity Wards
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After the intense experience of giving birth, the idea of being separated from your partner and forced to sleep apart can feel overwhelming.
But in many hospitals, once a woman leave a delivery room she is put on the maternity wing where partners are not allowed to stay.
And now a mum has divided internet users by highlighting her rage at this sitation, prompting a more general conversation about whether or not partners should be allowed to stay overnight in maternity wards.
My local hospital doesn't allow partners to stay on postnatal ward after their baby has been born. I think this is outrageous - unfair on the mother; unfair on the father, who's being made to feel unimportant. He needs to bond too. Do other UK hospitals have this rule?
- Annie Ridout (@annieridout) April 29, 2019
London-based author Annie Ridout tweeted that she thinks this is "outrageous" and "unfair on the mother; unfair on the father, who's being made to feel unimportant". She added that fathers need to bond too, but while many users agreed with her, many others disagreed.
Annie explained that her husband was not allowed to stay on the postnatal ward following the birth of their child. While some mums agreed that the rules were "annoying" and that fathers on the ward can actually be helpful to offer support to the new mum, others disagreed and said that while she may want her partner on the ward, other women might not want men on the ward overnight.
I'm so pleased to say my local hospital does which I was so so grateful for. I desperately needed and wanted my husband with me. He also did first nappy and clothes change and was there the whole time. It's ludicrous that a hospital wouldn't allow that!
- Sam Wright (@samkwright31) April 29, 2019
One woman wrote "So tricky. I remember my husband and I were both crying when he had to leave a few hours after I had my 1st. Absolutely the time we needed each other most. But I do see the predicament." While others said it was disruptive or cited incidents in which they had someone's "threatening partner" staying next to her.
While it's understandable that someone would want their husband there for support, help, and to ensure that he gets to bond with the child, many users were unsympathetic. One said, "it's one or two nights out of your life. A good dad will bond whatever, doing the first nappy change makes no difference." Another said, "I wished that partners hadn't have been allowed to stay as I got so little sleep due to the loudest snoring husband in my ward."
Plus I personally wouldn't want men staying on the bay wards, private room fine but not on a shared bay ward.
- goingaroundincircles (@LockesLostGirl) May 1, 2019
From the replies, it looks like different wards have different rules on whether or not men can stay overnight, but one thing is for sure - the issue is certainly divisive amongst new mums.
On open wards there's also other cultures to consider. You couldn't segregate wards but there would likely be issues around men who weren't family being there in what should be a private situation. Plus nurses being distracted from their work with extra people on ward 247
- Emma T (@ETusty) April 29, 2019