Double-Mastectomy Survivor Shuts Down Tinder Hopeful Who Asks If She Has 'Big T*ts'
Online dating can sometimes take a tough stomach. One day you could be striking up a lovely conversation with a friendly single, and the next, receiving face-less misogynist messages.
But when one guy asked "have you got big t*ts" to a cancer survivor, he got far more than he bargained for.
Krista Dunzy hadn't been using the dating app while going through double-mastectomy surgery, but decided to brave the dating world once again when she was recovered, which is when she received the vile message.
Angry at his opening line, the 26-year-old charity worker responded with a detailed account of her breast cancer battle since being diagnosed in March 2018, which has included 16 rounds of chemotherapy, 30 rounds of radiation and a double mastectomy.
Krista, from Dewar, in Oklahoma, US, went asked: "Do you have any idea what it was like for me to read that message from you?"
She then added: "I'm not TRYING to be a b*tch but if that's what it takes for you to learn how you shouldn't treat women, then I'm cool with being a "b*tch".
"Please think about things before you say them. I hope if you have a daughter she never gets messages like these," finishing with the savage: "Are you un-matching me or should I do it myself?"
The Tinder guy, named Jared, responded by calling Krista an "idiot" and said he didn't even read her full message, calling her "crazy".
He then told her to "stop acting like a feminist that gets you nowhere in life" before calling her a "dumb b*tch".
Speaking about her less-than-romantic encounter, Krista said: "When I read the message my first reaction was anger.
"I don't need a reminder of what has happened to my breasts. I see the scars across my chest every single day.
"The issue isn't with my lack of breasts due to breast cancer though, it's the lack of respect and human decency from him.
"That was the first message he ever sent to me. Those messages were the extent of our communication. I was hurt because he was so insistent, even when I told him my story."
She continued: "I've been on Tinder for a while, but I've come across this [behaviour] before on any platform you can think of, and in real life too.
"It just happens this is really personal to me and I went into a lot of detail about what I've been through. That's why it was so important for me to say this to him.
"I don't want Jared to treat another woman or girl like that ever again. I don't want his mum to be treated like that, or his sister, or his future daughter. I hope they are never treated like that.
"When it comes down to it, I want people to see that this is something women deal with on a daily basis. I don't want the blatant disrespect Jared showed to be normalised.
"Ultimately, I want women to feel empowered enough to stand up for themselves when someone makes them uncomfortable or is outright disrespectful.
"We owe it to ourselves to speak our truths and stand up for ourselves."
In March 2018, Krista was diagnosed with stage two invasive ductal carcinoma. Both her mum and aunt also had the disease, which lead her to her double mastectomy in September 2018, just after her 26th birthday.
On dating after her operation, Krista said: "Dating after the double mastectomy and diagnosis has been difficult. But so was dating before.
"It's hard to put yourself out there and be vulnerable. You never know how people are going to react when you tell them things on that level.
"I have even had a message from someone telling me that if I'm ever in central Oregon they'd like to buy me a beer. That's was pretty cool.
"I'm excited about my surgery and excited about my life.
"[Dating after the surgery] does make me nervous but I know eventually I'll find someone who treats me well and he'll be worth the wait."
Krista has now been given the all-clear, and is waiting for breast reconstruction surgery.
For support or advice on breast cancer, contact Breast Cancer Care online at breastcancercare.org.uk or by calling
0808 800 6000.
Featured Image Credit: Kennedy News